South Park x Reader

LUNATICS

I had only been outside for half an hour but the party managed to increase in size in that short time. It felt like there were hundreds of kids packed into this house, but thankfully Tolkien's place is spacious.
I shoved past a couple swaying in the doorway, to reach the living room. Holy hell, I was never going to find Nichole in this mess. There was a multitude of people in here I didn't recognize; I didn't think this many kids even went to our school.
Luckily, I spotted a familiar face quick. I walk towards him but he notices me first and makes his way to me.
"Tolkien, dude, have you seen Nichole?" I have never been happier to see him.
He shakes his head frantically, "No idea. I lost her about ten minutes ago when all of these fucking people showed up."
"Are you okay?" He's shaking like crazy.
He shakes his head again. "They're animals. They're all fucking animals. I'm losing it, Y/n."
"Just keep calm and we can go look for Nichole together." Nichole will mellow him. "She's probably upstairs, right?"
"I can't go upstairs. I can't leave these LUNATICS unsupervised down here." Tolkien emphasizes "lunatics" as if he was disciplining his children. No one could hear him over the booming music and yelling.
"What about the lunatics that are unsupervised upstairs?" I probably shouldn't worry him more, but I figured it was a good point.
"Shit. You're right. Y/n, I need you to go upstairs and clear it out."
Clear it out?!?
"I don't want to be that guy." No one wants to be that guy.
He grabs me by the shoulders, "I need you to do this for me. I trust you, I believe in you, you're amazing. Now go up there and run off some kids." He talks to me as if he's giving a pep talk.
I almost feel like I have to do this or he might die. I nod and turn on my heels to walk away but he stops me.
"One last thing."
"Yeah?"
"Make sure my hot wheels are untouched."
I nod, again. "Aye, aye."
As I walk to the large, wooden staircase, I look in the center of the room. The guests had cleared off the coffee table to set up beer pong. The stuff that was moved from the table was sitting carelessly on the floor and being stepped on. Poor Tolkien, he was struggling to keep the house tidy.
I get to the top of the staircase, everything seems pretty tame compared to down there. However, I notice all of the doors are shut. This cannot be good. I really didn't want to interrupt random people's sex.
I step over a drunk girl's legs and press my ear up to the door beside her. Soft music was playing, it was a totally different vibe than the music downstairs. I knock on the door and hear shuffling.
Please, please, please god, don't let them be having sex.
The door slightly opens and Craig is peeking at me through the crack.
"Oh. It's just you." He fully opens the door and motions me in.
Tweek, Nichole, Kyle, and Red are sitting on Tolkiens bed. The door shuts behind me and I walk over to Nichole and sit directly in front of her.
"Thank god I found you." I hug her like I haven't seen her in years.
"Were you looking for me?" She pulls away but our arms remain linked.
"Yes and Tolkien is too. He's a wreck down there." I point at the ground. It's not until now I notice the thick fog floating around the room. "What the hell are you guys doing in here?"
"We're hiding out. There's too many people!" Tweek didn't spazz when he talked like he normally does.
A large cloud of smoke comes from behind me and I swat it away. I look at everyone's faces.
They're all stoned.
That explains Tweek, weed really calms his nerves. Whenever he has a bad panic attack, Craig packs a bowl.
I turn around to glare at Craig. "Could you not blow it in my direction?"
"There's fresh air out there, cupcake." He nods behind him, towards the door.
I roll my eyes. "Tolkien wants me to clear everyone out from up here."
"What? Like kick people from the party?" Kyle asks.
"I guess so. I wasn't really sure if he just wanted me to send them downstairs or what?" He wasn't quite clear on the instructions.
"Kicking them out it is." Craig passes the pipe to Red and walks to the door. "Honey, some assistance?" Tweek follows suit and the two leave.
  I guess Craig wants to be that guy.
Nichole lightly taps my arm, "Hey, how'd things go with Clyde?" She sounds overly excited.
"That's why I was looking for you. Things got a little weird when we were alone."
Red perks up, "What happened?"
I glance at Nichole, then back at Red. Her eyes were dilated and she was staring into my soul.
"I think that's a conversation for me and Nichole. So.. Nichole?" I say her name enthusiastically, hoping she'd take the hint.
I don't know Red very well, so I wouldn't feel very comfortable talking to her about what happened. I don't really want things to get around and everything end up misconstrued. Especially after finding out Clyde lied about Lola.
"Aw, Red won't bite. She's chill Y/n." The pipe finds it way to Nichole.
I look at Kyle who was also in the room, "What about him?"
"Whatever you say will live rent free in my mind." He taps his temple.
"Wow, so zen." Nichole takes another hit off the bowl and passes it to me. "Want a hit?"
I shake my head and push it back her way, "No thanks."
"C'mon. I thought you were trying to live tonight." She whines.
"I did. Outside. With Clyde." The tone of my voice remained the same through each word.
"Spill the beans. What happened?" She's still holding the pipe, which had burned out. Red reaches over Kyle and grabs it, as well as the lighter.
Well, she's never going to leave me alone unless I tell her and she's too high to move off the bed.
"He kissed me." I blurt.
"WHAT!" Nichole squealed.
"Yeah, it was probably a mistake." He was probably drinking and didn't think it through.
"No, your mistake was being alone with him. Clyde's a total horndog." Red said monotonely, which didn't make me feel any better about the situation.
"Ugh, don't tell her that." Nichole slaps Red's arm. "He's sweet and he likes you."
"Was it sweet?" Red raises her brow, she seems skeptical.
I shrug, "I don't know, maybe?" I'm not even sure.
"Well, what'd you do? Did you kiss him back? Was there tongue? Oh, and where were his hands? That's very telling of a kiss." Nichole was asking so many questions. She's way too excited about someone else's kiss.
"Ew, no. There wasn't any tongue. It was my first kiss, not a make out sesh."
Red snorts, "Your first kiss was with Clyde Donovan? You poor girl."
I knew I shouldn't have said anything in front of her.
"The who doesn't matter. She had it! Finally! Where were his hands, Y/n?" Nichole's eyes flickered between mine as she smiles excitedly.
Kyle chimes in, "Guys, you're forgetting a very important detail." We all look at him. "Bebe."
Oh my god Bebe. I haven't even thought about her. I face palm, one word completely ruined my first kiss. Bebe.
"Okay.. so maybe the who does matter." Nichole giggles uncomfortably.
I pull my legs to my chin and rest my face on my knees. I'm an idiot.
"It's okay Y/n. It's not like they're really dating, right?" Nichole looks to other two for back up.
Red nods in agreement. "Right. I mean she took Pete Melman to homecoming."
"And Clyde brought no one because it is widely accepted that Bebe owns him." I speak through my legs.
"You're overthinking it, you have nothing to worry about. We're the only ones that know. She'll never find out." Nichole reassures me.
I life my head and smile at her; she's such a great friend.
"That's if Clyde doesn't blabber. The kid has a big mouth." Red adds.
"You know, you're really bad at this whole comforting thing." Nichole glares at her.
"That is a high possibility. He can't keep secrets." Kyle's agrees with Red.
  They're right. I love him to death, but he's awful with secrets.
"You both suck." Now Nichole is glaring at them both.
"I'm not saying he will tell Bebe, but he i-"
  Before Kyle could finished his statement, the door swings open.
"You guys need to get downstairs like now. There's a fight." Said a random brunette.