In Another Life (EreJean)

six

Chapter summary: Jean learns about his relationship with Eren in this universe.

"Did you say boyfriend?"

It's a useless question. Eren's words couldn't have been more clear. But Jean can't think of anything else to say.

"Yeah," Eren answers. With a small pout, he looks away. "I guess we never made it official, but I never felt like we had to." He locks eyes with Jean again and grabs his hand. "I mean, we're together, aren't we?"

Jean presses his back to the wall like he wants to fuse with it. The knot in his stomach tightens, forcing the steak he demolished earlier back up his esophagus. Eren watches him, none the wiser that his thumb caressing Jean's knuckles increases the likelihood that the latter will throw up on him.

Jean takes two long breaths before he forgets how.

"This is insane," he says. "This is absolutely insane."

"What's insane?"

"This!" He yanks his hand away. "Eren, quit messing around. You don't like me like that."

It has the opposite effect. Eren's expression softens, almost appearing offended. Instead of reaching for Jean's hand again, Eren cups a palm around his hip.

His hand is warm. Too warm. Slim fingers slip beneath the hem of Jean's shirt as Eren grasps him with purpose.

"Of course I do. Jean, you're everything to me."

"No I'm not," Jean argues.

Hands tight around Eren's shoulders, Jean pushes him an arm's distance away. It's not enough space to alleviate Jean's stress, but this wall has become his safe haven. Something in this room needs to serve the role of holding him upright, and he refuses to give Eren that privilege.

"You hate me," Jean says. "I hate you. That's the way it's always been, remember? I'm not even into guys."

Ever since Jean hit puberty, it's been all about girls. He isn't the best at charming them, but that doesn't stop his admiration. Girls are cute. They're compassionate. They have beautiful hair and beautiful smiles and even the slightest bit of physical contact will keep Jean awake for hours replaying the memory.

The number of times he felt that way about a boy? Zero. Zilch. Nil.

He may be in a different universe, but universes can't alter sexualities. Jean Kirstein is straight. Always has been, always will be.

Besides, even if he were attracted to boys, Jean would never crush on Eren fucking Jaegar. Maybe Marco or Armin, someone who doesn't make him want to bash his head into a wall. But he spent all morning with Marco, and Armin was quite chatty at dinner. Neither of them evoked any romantic feelings from Jean, which proves this whole thing is bullshit.

Jean's convinced of it. Eren, not so much.

"Oh, God," he says, eyes widening. "You forgot about me."

His eyes don't leave Jean, but Jean refuses to meet his gaze. Jean focuses on Eren's ear. It's away enough from Eren's face that the lump in Jean's throat subsides, but close enough that he doesn't appear too intimidated.

"Connie mentioned earlier that you lost some of your memories after you hit your head," Eren mutters, "but I never thought you'd actually forget me. Or us."

Us. The way he says it sets Jean's skin on fire. Like it's something Jean should thank the heavens for instead of damn to hell.

Eren sighs and shuffles over to Jean's desk. Jean wants to protest because his belongings and Eren Jaeger is a combination that should never mix, but allows it for the ample breathing room Eren's absence provides.