Gabriel had trouble sleeping last night, but that wasn't a surprise. His sleep pattern had been altered since the day Nathalie disappeared, and it's yet to return to normal.
If he hadn't been so consumed in trying to get to sleep, Gabriel thinks he would've eventually stood up from his bed to go and talk to her one more time. He doesn't feel comfortable with the way their conversation ended yesterday. Although they didn't end entirely bad, he still feels a sting of discomfort from it all.
Except, Gabriel had no energy whatsoever. His body was literally aching in exhaustion even as he couldn't get his eyes to shut. He's sure he would've looked more like a walking zombie than an actual human if he had gone and spoken with her. So he remained in bed, thinking about anything and everything. Thinking of a way to fix the mess he feels he has created. But even after so many hours of overthinking, he couldn't come up with a decent solution.
The only solution would be for Nathalie to recover her memory, but now he's afraid of the future, regardless of her state of memory. Nathalie can very well remain angry and distant towards him, even after she recovers her memory, so Gabriel really isn't holding his breath for that anymore.
Sometimes, he's sure she loves him. He can see it in her eyes. Especially on those two separate occasions in which they've kissed. The movement of her lips against his were a reminder of the way she used to kiss him before.
At least that hasn't changed.
She still has her same habits. Her same likes and dislikes. He can recognize them each time. The way she unconsciously adjusts her glasses when she wants to have a closer look at something or the way in which she moves her hair behind her ear even when it's not in the way.
Her voice is still firm and clear. That calming tune in which Gabriel fell in love with.
But other times, Gabriel feels like she's a stranger next to him. And that hurts more than anything. Viewing the same Nathalie he loves and adores acting like a different person.
A person he doesn't recognize anymore, and Gabriel knows it's not her fault, however he can't help the agony building inside his already aching soul.
The woman who was once Nathalie Sancoeur is deeply yet lightly hidden by another version of herself. A version he is so desperately trying to understand.
He then wonders how he should cope with this all. He wonders how much longer. It appears he'll be condemned to a life of sorrow and unhappiness if he hasn't already.
Because that sprinkle of hope has begun to fade, and that's what frightens him the most.
———
Gabriel makes his way through the corridor of the mansion, ready to meet his son for breakfast. As he spots Nathalie's bedroom door, still a few feet away, he wonders if she's awoken already.
He wants to pass through discreetly, not wanting to invade her space, but as he gets closer to the door, the sound coming from inside startles him.
The sound of heavy breathing and sobbing invades his ears, and now Gabriel needs to know what's going on.
"Nathalie", he calls out while knocking on the door.
"Nathalie, what's going on?" He can't hear much over her sobbing, but he's sure he has at least heard some incoherent words being mumbled by her.
"I'm going to come in", Gabriel says.
When he pushes the door open, he finds Nathalie in the middle of the bedroom, thrown on the floor with various items in front of her.
He quickly goes to her, kneeling down beside her. "What's going, why are you like this?"
She doesn't answer. It appears she's mute with some type of nervous breakdown as all she can do is sob uncontrollably.
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Stranded Memories (Gabenath)
FanfictionAfter an argument with Gabriel, Nathalie seemigly disappears. Months later, she reappers with amnesia and a baby in between her arms.