A thousand years had passed since the death of Florida Man's best friend, chad. In that time, he had lost and won many battles, gone on many adventures and had fought many people. However they aren't relevant, so I won't type stories on them.
He was now being trained by the god of the universe, Brent Jones. One day during his training in the sacred Meme temple, he met 2 other gods in training. Shrek and Caseoh.
Caseoh was sent on a mission to planet Jupiter. Meanwhile Shrek and Florida Man were paired together by Brent, and sent to the Australian outback to track down a man who constantly made fun of them.
Shrek and Florida Man were teleported to Australia, in the middle of the outback.
Immediately, a swarm of 30 kangaroos all ganged up on the two. Florida Man and Shrek nodded to each other, and then pulled out two golden monster energy cans. They flew into the air and smashed them down onto the kangaroos, blowing them up into a pile of flesh and blood.
The two celebrate for the bloodbath they just created and continue their journey.
They come across a 7 story mansion in the middle of the outback, surrounded by luxurious blue pools and fancy golden fences.
They stand outside the golden gate of the mansion, and soon a man, who appeared to be a glass pitcher with a red liquid inside, stepped out to the gate.
Kool Aid Man's Dad: "How can I help you?"
Shrek: "Aye man, we'r lookin' for a man wi' a' blonde haircut an' a-"
Kool Aid Man's Dad: "He went that way."
Kool Aid Man's Dad, Reginald, pointed toward a 15 story luxurious mansion which sat beside his mansion.
Shrek: "How did we not see that?"
Shrek and Florida man soon smashed through the roof of the 15 story mansion, and shrek immediately fell into a saw trap, where he was sliced to hundreds of pieces by a pit of sawblades.
Florida Man vomited and all of the sawblades melted from the vomit. Florida Man hopped down, snapping his fingers as he fell and returning Shrek to his normal state.
Shrek and Florida Man ran through multiple hallways, reducing guard dogs and police officers to dust.
They finally arrived to Australia Man's throne room, in which Australia Man himself sat in a throne constructed from solid gold.
Australia Man: "WHO DARES CHALLENGE ME?"
A giant spider ran to the throne and Australia man hopped on top of it. On top of the spider's head sat a grill, where australia man would cook.
Australia Man began his attack, charging toward Florida Man and Shrek at high speed.
Florida Man was immediately thrown against the wall, however Shrek held his ground.
Shrek would pull a railgun out of his mouth and aim it at the spider.
The spider screeched before it exploded into 500,000 pieces.
Australia Man fell right onto his ass and broke his legs.
Shrek then picked up australia man and bit his head off.
Shrek dragged florida man by the ankle and they went home, their mission complete.
Florida Man and Shrek then made out in the center of the godly meme temple, writhing on the floor as they did so.
CaseOh walked in and immediately screamed at the top of his respiratory system.
The two made out for a little while longer until Florida Man sneezed in Shrek's face and stood up.
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Florida Man: The Prequels
HumorTake a trip back in time to the early years of Florida Man's life!
