First Fault

Time Jump

Your heart wasn't an easy win. But I wasn't giving up.

                                  ~♡~
10 years later...

I thought that tummy turning was only bad before a tennis match. Try meeting your daughter for the first time. My stomach has twisted right out of me.

"Max Freed!" I say in mock disbelief as I walk side by side with my ... with Khaliya. Nova and Zuri are way behind us at a good stalker distance. I gave up on turning my head to give both women the signal to not leave me alone with Khaliya. They both turn to look behind them every time I do it per Nova's request because Zuri was ready to come to my rescue. Nova just gets a kick at watching me squirm uncomfortably.

"Yeah, he is an awesome player. He won Wimbledon twice. And because he is my dad, he is my favourite player by default." Khaliya shrugs licking at her ice cream. She is getting it everywhere; but who cares when you're a kid? Kids are dirty creatures even in that stage after toddler but before teen. I missed that stage of Nova's life, so I figured that they were only dirty creatures when they were in diapers. Boy, was I wrong!

"I've won Wimbledon four times one in which I beat Freed!" I try to coax her judgement. I can't not be my ... Khaliya's favourite player.

"Okay, I like him because he is my dad." She munches on her cone. Crunch! Crunch!

"Why am I not your favourite player?" It's bugging me. She doesn't even stop to think or hesitate before she answers ."Because you're always on the TV at home. You're mummy's favourite player.  But she confuses me, though." She purses her lips and scrunchs her eyebrows.

"Why?"

"Because she always cries when she watches you. You're not my favourite because Mum always cries after she watches you. And I don't get it." She scratches her hair and turns to meet her mother's eyes. I've noticed she keeps turning back to see if she is still there. It's like she is worried Zuri might just disappear any moment now. Zuri smiles every time reassuringly while talking to Nova behind us. There was a time in my life when I cared for four girls only. I only had three special girls: Mum, Nova, Zuri, and Yara. Mum is gone now, Yara is off somewhere. As I ponder this, a warm thought flutters around the space in my mind. I think Mum might be making space for a new girl in my life. I know I'm bipolar but being in her company right now is making me want to add her to my list. This is why her approval is important.

"Can we go feed the ducks?" I nod and follow her when she bursts into a run toward the pond. "This is Mama Duck, and these are her babies. Yolky is my favourite. "She points to the brightest plain yellow duck of the flock. She goes as close as possible and sits down to watch her favourite duck." Yolky loves Mama Duck the most." I take a seat beside her and listen to her talk." Why do you say that?" I question watching the ducklings follow their Mama.

"Because Yolky is always under Mama Duck's wing." She points and for sure. The duck she named Yolky is out of the neat formation and is swaddled under Mama's wing. "Yolky is me. I love my Mama the most." She turns her head again. This time, Zuri waves at her, which puts a smile on Khaliya's face. My sister and Zuri are still lagging way behind us. I think we're waiting for them, that is why we're watching the ducks swim.

"I'm going to be ten next month." Khaliaya suddenly tells me.

"What day?" She thinks for a while and says it excitedly." July the third." I'll be sure to remember that day. Third of July, something is supposed to be happening on the third of July. It is nagging and scratching at my brain, but for now, I leave it.

"Did you show Uncle Kal your duck?" Zuri says, taking a seat beside her. Khaliya reaches for Zuri's hand and holds it.

"It's not my duck; it belongs to the park." Khaliya corrects Zuri, who apologises for her mistake while biting her cheeks. I know suppressing a laugh.

"I'm going to meet up with Jules by the fountain. See ya Kally." Nova kisses my cheek and gives Zuri and Khaliya each a hug before she bursts into a run to meet up with her friend.

Zuri reaches behind Khaliya to poke me. I face her, and she mouths, "Should we tell her now?" I purse my lips and, for a second, get cold feet. I swallow my fear and nod before I change my mind. Suddenly, my heartbeat is in my ear. What if she rejects me?

"Kalem." I get poked in the side when a soft voice calls for me. The ring in my ear stops instantly, and I look down at Khaliya, who is pointing at the ducks, dunking their heads in the water.

"Sugarplum, I need to tell you something." Khaliya gives Zuri her full attention. I feel sweat beads starting to form down my back, and my neck hair rises.

"Hmm."

"This man sitting next to you isn't just my friend. He is your dad." We wait for her reaction, which, to me, takes forever to show. She looks at me and then turns back to her mother. "Is that why you're always crying when we watch his games?" Zuri flushes and doesn't look me in the eye. She opens and closes her mouth. Even I'd not be able to answer if I were in her position.

"He makes you cry. He hurt us." Khaliya immediately gets protective of her Mum.

"No, no honey.  He didn't. I promise he is nice. He was my favourite person in this whole world until you came around and showed me your love." She is quick to defend me. She meets my eyes, and I can see she is pleading with me to say something.

"Hi, I'm Kalem Dalton, and I'm your dad." I extend my arm out in front of her.

"Hmmm." She eyes my hand hesitantly for a beat before she uses her four fingers to grasp my one and shakes my hand.

"My name is Khaliya Zanenah  Andrews. My friends call me Leeyah but you can call me Khaliya." Her friendly, comfortable posture has turned cold and rigid. She holds me under her stare, which I add is intimidating.

"Nice to meet you." I try to shift the mood again, but this nine-year-old isn't having it.

"So I guess this makes me your favourite player by default," I add a chuckle to try to break the ice.

"You're not my dad." She crosses her arms over her chest, "Khaliya!" Zuri warns her. However, I stop Zuri before she can continue.

"I believe the young lady is right. I have to earn the title. And I'd like to start tomorrow if you'd allow me." I hold my breath and wait for her to speak again," I'll think about it." With that, she gets up and walks closer to the bank of the lake.

"I'm sorry. She thinks you hurt me, and that is why she is being like this. I'm sure so many questions are running through her mind, and that is my fault. But I promise she isn't a difficult-" Zuri rambles on apologetic, "I wasn't expecting to be crowned dad of the year today. Relax I'm glad she is giving me a hard time. It means you grew her up to be strong." When in reality, I'm just glad she didn't completely reject me.