sunk-cost fallacy. ᵖˢʰ

nine.

"How much do you even know him?" Jia asks on a Tuesday evening days later. She has her brown scarf on that Chanelle knitted herself last winter. The sky above is full of tumultuous, dark and raging clouds.

Chanelle feels a discomfort in her chest at the question. She didn't realise it until now of how little she actually knew about him. It's impossible to do so anyway when he doesn't even let anybody in.

"I know enough."

"This is exactly what someone would say when they're uncertain about something," Jia raises her brows.

"I only know what he wants me to know," Chanelle says, glancing down at the crunched leaves beneath her shoes. "I, too, only let him know what I want him to know about me."

Jia looks at her with descriptively sharp eyes for someone who claims to be a lightweight. She then shakes her head and looks away.

"That's not how it works."

𓆝 𓆟 𓆞

The next morning, Chanelle asks him a question. It might be because Jia's words have been haunting her all night, or maybe it's because of her own conflicting emotions.

"Do you have any siblings?" she asks him as they walk side by side to their classes.

"Yes. A younger sister," he pauses in surprise. "Why?"

"Just asking," Chanelle shrugs. She ignores the curious look on his face. "Small talk."

On Thursday, she asks him what's his favourite movie during lunch. He eyes her suspiciously before answering.

"The Lion King. Are you going to stop being weird now?"

Chanelle only grins, taking a small bite of her sandwich.

When Friday rolls around, she asks him what makes him happy in the middle of their P.E class.

"You. What's with all these questions lately?"

"So you also don't like answering questions?" Chanelle asks, just to annoy the heck out of this guy. "Got it."

"It's not like that," Sunghoon sighs, running his fingers through his hair that is drenched in sweat from playing basketball. "It's you asking me these questions that scares me."

Chanelle hangs her head, "I just... I barely know you."

"Yes you do," he side-eyes her, leaning back on the heels of his hands. "In fact you know me well enough."

"Hardly," she rolls her eyes when Sunghoon laughs. A sweet one, at that—where his dimple makes their appearance. "It's just that... you didn't tell me about the test the other day."

Sunghoon is silent for a minute and focuses his eyes on the court where Jake is going on about how Heeseung's foot was on the line when he shoots the ball straight into the net.

"I didn't know that's what you want. Would it be better if I told you about these things then?"

There's no point in lying, so she nods. "You opened up to me about your injury that turns out not everyone knows back in Aetherwind. I thought you might just start sharing things with me, you know."

"Well, you don't really share things with me either, generally speaking," Sunghoon tilts his head. His lips pressed tight. "I would've liked it too if you shared anything with me since, you know, we're both stuck in this mess."

"I never thought it'll matter to you. We'll go back to our normal lives once this is over anyway," Chanelle says, fiddling with her fingers.

Sunghoon clears his throat and looks away. "I do want to know. It doesn't have to end or that we have to act like we really broke up. We can still be friends."

Chanelle turns to him. "Does that mean you're going to tell me anything from now on?"

"Only if you do too," he says, holding her gaze. "Tell me something real."

Chanelle raises a brow. "Like what?"

He shrugs. "Like what keeps your beautiful mind up at night."

"Oh." It's barely a whisper. "Insomnia, actually. Been a few months now, but I never told anyone."

"See?" Sunghoon flashes a small smile. "That's what friends do. When it's just the two of us, I don't expect you to act like we're together or something. You do realise you don't have to act like you're my girlfriend all the time, right? Better to think of me as your friend instead."

"Friends," Chanelle repeats. "So you're my friend now."

Sunghoon hums, lips tugging upwards. "A handsome friend, by the way."

Chanelle gives him a look, which he laughs in return before standing up. "I'm going back to the court, can't let 12-B win this match," he says, and grins before walking away back to the court.

Once he's gone, Chanelle thinks about it for a second.

Friends don't touch each other the way Sunghoon does even when no one's around. And friends—don't make Chanelle's heart beat faster every time his hands rests gently on her waist.

But perhaps, friends buys a box of a very expensive chamomile tea that helps with insomnia hidden in her locker the next Monday.