Never a Person (Class of 09 x Snoot Game)

Chapter 2

You ever wanted to tear your whole skin off? No? Well, I sure as FUCK did!!!

Only a few minutes after meeting that pink lizard, I realized this is the longest I've been sober. Now that all the shit I used to fog up my mind was gone, and all the pain and misery was leaking out of my pores.

My sweat was like worms growing out of my skin. I swear my nails bled from how much I itched myself. My teeth were like rubber, I had a kidney stone in my brain, and the starvation felt even more serious. All I had to eat for breakfast from that guy's place was cornflakes and tequila. In. The. Same. Bowl!

But none was as bad as the memories. I took the drugs to forget the most fucked up shit I did while having to do my 'favors.' And even though they didn't come back in a full picture, it still fucking sucked... Don't know if I can say 'suck' anymore.

I got flashes of a ferret, a corkscrew with butter on it, and some bald guy with no eyebrows saying 'Butterfly kisses. Butterfly kisses! BUTTERFLY KISSES!!!' over and over and over again.

I couldn't retain anything from my first few classes; it's not like I ever paid attention to those anyway, but at least once I wish they were engaging enough to distract me from my thoughts. I was good at faking appearances, smiling, the normal sociopathic manipulator routine, and it was good enough to trick the teachers. But Jesus...

I have to get something inside me... Food, water, dirt, anything!

Time was so slow. I couldn't wait for lunch. I didn't care if I had to sit with a bunch of weirdos anymore. Whatever Reed had... Maybe I should've gone fishing for the stuff in the toilet.

Had to keep myself from falling over on my way to the cafeteria. Whenever I passed by the other students I tried to walk normally, but for the most part, I had to use the wall to keep me up.

Didn't like the feeling I got when I showed up either. I think the withdrawal was giving me hallucinations or something. Or maybe it was just because of all the colors that hit me.

In every human school I went to, the first day at the cafeteria was always the same. My routine when showing up was even systematic. I'd first see a bunch of bland, faceless nobodies in the middle; right in between the stupid, mostly blonde, white, popular groups talking about fashion, shitty pop songs, and debates about whose fucking who, and the rejects who wore retro clothes to look cool, are fat, and are on some kind of disability service.

But for some reason, everyone looked like that middle group. Everyone was faceless, and ironically, it was because of how complicated everyone looked. On one end I'd see a mix of triceratopses, spinosauruses and... fuck! I realize I don't know all the different types of dinosaurs. That's how crazy it was.

I saw one with a long neck. I think they're called brochiloasaurus, or something. Another with a long, feathery tail that I thought was another velociraptor, but she was eating vegetables, and didn't have sharp teeth. And one that had the snout and feathers of a pterodactyl, but with no wings at all.

One of my instincts was to guess that the t-rexes would be the cis-white-male equivalent to dinosaurs considering that's what literally everyone thinks of when they talk about them; so they must be the popular ones I had to sit with, but there were only, like, three or four in the whole cafeteria. And one of them had giant glasses with braces... So just no.

It feels racist to say that everyone looks alike, but is it racist to say everyone looks too different?

They were all distinct to the point where they all blended together in a giant mess that I wasn't ready for. Something that I couldn't feel through being around humans this whole time.