Do you ever have those nights were you're lying in bed staring up at the dark ceiling above?Because I do, I have those nights quite often. All these different thoughts fill my mind.Sometimes my mind is empty.
River Jude, did you ever have nights like that? Why did you turn to drugs? I sometimes wonder if it's because you were unhappy, or unsatisfied with your life. Was it an act of rebellion? Maybe you wanted to prove that you weren't as perfect people thought you were.
Jonathan Brandis, what were your final thoughts before you hanged yourself? What had pushed you to the breaking point? Was it really your unsatisfying career that made you do it? I like to think that maybe if I were there with you during those nights then maybe things would be different. I like to think that maybe you'd still be here, that you could have been more successful. That you could be happy. I also like to think that maybe you needed me just as much I do you. Maybe if i'm not the light you've been looking for, then we could find it together.
I wonder if you were as lonely as I am now. Do you ever hate the feeling of waking up all alone except for a tear stained pillow to fill that emptiness within you?
p.s
