The Wolf's Bride

Chapter 14

Days later, after a very awkward conversation with Alekin, I found myself on my second book in only four days. It would have been a nice achievement if it wasn't pitiful.

Wherever I looked now, there was at least one book. They were everywhere, on every counter, every desk. And Alekin reassured me that I could take as many I wanted to, and that I could even read in the library.

When he first said that, I wanted to say yes, to lounge on an armchair next to the giant windows, surrounded by books, but then I'd remembered about Cressida, and her meaning in Alekin's life. I was still nowhere close to finding her, but I didn't want to stay in his house while I waited for her. I didn't want her to get the wrong idea.

I was married to her mate! How much wrong of an idea could she even get. Everytime my thoughts ran back to her, I lost myself in more pages, more books, more stories, anything to keep me from the reality of my life.

Right now, I was enjoying myself with a rather cheesy romance between a baker and a princess. It made me think of what a life next to a baker would truly be, and surprisingly, ut wasn't hard for me to imagine myself as a baker's wife.

One of the books I had borrowed was a recipe book, and I'd tried my hand at making some of the recipes with the ingredients I had. I'd vomited once, but that was only because I ate an entire batch of cookies. Had I known I was such an impressive cool I would've definitely chosen to be a baker's wife. That would've suited me better.

It was easy to picture myself as a baker's wife, since my mother had a sweet tooth and the baker from the village nearby came weekly to our house. He was shorter than Alekin, but still taller than me. A man in his thirties with a big body, resembling a bear, he had a round belly, that didn't necessarily make him unattractive. There were always beads of sweat on his forehead when he arrived at out doorstep, from pushing the cart of good from the village to our estate, but he had a warm smile. Like most people, he, too, doted on my sister and made her everything she asked for. Unlike most people, he smiled at me as well, and gave me cookies and chocolates even when I hadn't requested them.

It wasn't that hard at all to imagine myself in his humble bakery, moving around from stove to stove, cheeking on the delicious goods. I would probably be a little fatter...stuffed with mouthwatering desserts and doted on by a loving husband.

The baker...he was a man I wouldn't mind having children with. Of course, he already had that. He already had a wife and two children, possibly a third on the way. I'd seen her only once, when my father took me to his bakery for a larger order. A cake bigger than me for my mother's birthday party. The baker's wife was exactly what I imagined she would be. A bigger woman, with a more powerful built, made to carry large batches of goods, like pies, with a swollen belly, full of life. She was pregnant with her second child then, and although weight from her first pregnancy was visible on her I couldn't help but stare at how beautiful she looked, how happy and fulfilled. And I couldn't help but feel my heart clench at seeing how the baler looked at her, like she was worth more than us, or other high-born lady and men, worth more than the king or queen. She was more than that to him, and it was so visible in the way he looked at her, like she was his entire world, that I'd cried that night, when we returned from the bakery.

There were plenty of other bakers in the world, I reassured myself. But I was already married...to someone that was already mated, to someone else. It was just wonderful.

With a sigh, I put down my book, all my fantasies with it, and stood up, walking to the door. There had been no knock, no sound, no inkling that anyone was even close to my cottage, but when I opened the door Alekin was there, his hand balled into a fist, ready to knock. I lifted my eyes to his, tilting my head back. His brow was arched as he looked down, not in confusion or mockery, just curiosity.