The Cracks I Didn't See - COMPLETED

THE CRACKS I DIDN'T SEE - VI

The big day of my eye operation had finally come, and my family was there to root for me.

Shet, kinakabahan na ako! Kase, what if, ginawa na ng lahat ng doctor pero wala pa rin akong makita? Paano ako makakabawi kay Russel?

Naalala ko tuloy bigla sinRussel kagabi. Pagkatapos niya akong kantahan ay hindi na siya kumibo. Dire-diretso na ang tulog niya. Kanina ngang umaga ay maaga rin daw siyang umalis eh. Hindi niya na ako ginising kaya nagtatampo ako dahil hindi niya ako masasamahan ngayon!

"Anak! Anak! Ready ka na ba, ha?You've got this, okay? You're gonna rock it!" My dad said with his bubbly tone. I could imagine him saying that with a thumbs-up. Iniimagine ko pa lang siya sa jologs niyang itsura habang sinasabi iyon sa akin ay natatawa na ako.

"Yeah, Maia, you're gonna slay that operation!" My younger sister — Aiah added.

"Don't sweat it, girl. You'll be a pro at this," my mom reassured me, giving me a tight hug.

"Ang oa niyo ha?" Tumatawang sambit ko kaya't nagtawanan din sila.

I appreciated their efforts for cheering me up, pero isang boses lang ang hinahanap ng puso ko, at hindi ko pa siya nararamdaman kanina pa.

Mabuti na lang dahil nandito sila. Kahit papaano ay nawawala sa isip ko si Russel. Nagaalala talaga ako sa kanya eh. Pakiramdam ko, may hindi tama sa kanya... O sa amin.

May nasabi kaya ako? Pero if meron naman kase, for sure ay sasabihin niya agad. Never naman siyang naglihim sa akin. Kahit nga brand ng brief niya ay sinasabi niya pa sa akin para tuwing pasko daw ay hindi ko na kaylangan pang magtanong sa kanya.

Siraulo, 'di ba?

"S-Si... Si R-Russel po pala?" Biglang tanong ko bago man lang ako ipasok sa operating room.

Naramdaman ko ang paghaplos ng isang para ng kamay sa buhok ko. "Hahabol si Russel, Hija. For sure ay may tinatapos lang 'yun tapos ay pupuntahan ka na niya dito. Focus on yourself for now. He'll show up later." Tita Cecile, Russel's mom, assured me.

I nodded, trying to keep my spirits high as I headed into the operation room.

The operation went on, and I could feel my heart racing as the doctors worked on my eyes. Finally, it was done. Slowly, the doctor removed the bandage on my eyes, and my surroundings came into focus.

White.

White background, and slowly, naging visible ang mga mukha nila. My heart was pounding with excitement and a hint of nervousness. As the world around me became clear, I couldn't hold back the tears of joy. The vibrant colors, the shapes, everything was so vivid and beautiful. I felt overwhelmed by the gift of sight I had been given.

"Ano ang nakikita mo?" The doctor asked As he showed me an image of a lion.

"Lion?" I answered back, and I heard them clapping because of joy.

"What about this one? What color is this?" He asked again.

I looked at the object he was holding and it was an apple, "Red." I answered back, and he nodded.

I can already see clearly. Mabilis na inilibot ko ang paningin sa loob ng kwarto at kitang-kita ko sa mga mukha nila ang saya.

However, amidst the happiness, I scanned the room, expecting him to be right there by my side but he was nowhere to be found.

I nervously looked around for Russel as the atmosphere in the room grew tense and eerie. My family, including Tita Cecile, became unusually silent, and a different level of fear enveloped my heart. It was as if they were hiding something from me, and I couldn't understand why they wouldn't respond to my questions.

"Guys, where's Russel?" I asked, my voice trembling with a mix of anxiety and frustration. "Akala ko, susunod siya?"

"Anak, anak please calm down first. Mabuti pa ay magpahinga ka muna—" Agad akong umiling at agad iginala ang paningin sa kabuuan ng kwarto upang hagilapin ang iisang taong kagabi ko pa hinahanap.

Ang sabi niya kagabi ay may gagawin lang siya, ngunit nakatulog na ako't lahat ay hindi ko pa naririnig ang boses niya.

"Dad, please, tell me first where Russel is." Pakiusap ko sa kanya ngunit nag iwas lang siya ng tingin.

"Guys, where's Russel? Why is everyone so quiet?" I asked, my voice trembling with a mix of anxiety and frustration.

"Aiah, ang kuya mo? Nasaan? I-chat mo nga please. Tanungin mo kung pauwi na." Utos ko sa kapatid ko ngunit imbis na sundin ang utos ko ay yumuko lang ito at nagsimulang umiyak.

"Mama, ano ba? Sumagot kayo. Nasaan si Russel?" Muling tanong ko, halos sigaw na but instead of getting answers, they exchanged uneasy glances, avoiding eye contact with me. The tension in the room was palpable, and it sent shivers down my spine.

"Come on, you guys, don't keep me in the dark! What's going on? Sabihin niyo naman sa akin!" I pleaded, feeling like a volcano ready to erupt with emotions.

Finally, my mom stepped forward, her eyes glistening with tears. "Maia, bagong opera ang mga mata mo. Ipagpahinga mo muna 'yan." Saway ni Mama.

Mukhang ayaw nilang magsalita talaga. Mas lalo lang dinaga ng kaba ang dibdib ko. Pakiramdam ko ay nahihirapan akong lumunok at tanging magagawa ko lamang ay ang maghanap.

"Paano naman akong magpapahinga eh hindi niyo sinasabi sa akin kung nasaan ang fiancé ko!" Bulalas ko saka bumaba sa kama ngunit agad akong pinigilan nila Mama.

"Anak... kumalma ka muna. Sasabihin din naman namin sa'yo pero kumalma ka." Sabat ni Tita Cecile saka ako marahang itinulak papaupo sa kama. Her eyes were bloodshot at sa paghawak niya sa akin ay hindi nakaligtas sa pangdama ko ang panginginig niya.

My heart skipped a beat, and my mind raced with possibilities, none of which I was prepared to face. "Tell me, Tita? Where is he?" I pressed, trying to steady my trembling voice.

My family hesitated, and the silence seemed to stretch on forever, adding to the suspense building up inside me. They exchanged glances once again, and the weight of their unspoken words felt like a heavy burden to me.

"MA, PLEASE! JUST TELL ME!" I urged, my patience wearing thin as rage started to simmer like lava in a volcano about to erupt.

Tita Cecile finally took a deep breath, and her voice trembled as she said, "Maia, Russel... he's no longer alive."