Monster (Ryeji)

Consequences laid in dust pt.2

In reality, Ryujin didn't want to know. She didn't know if she could accept the fact she had become the very thing she had been taught to fear, to fight, her whole life. But slowly, through the wrappings she could see clearly, where her elbow had once been now lay a dark grey, mechanical joint. Wires feeding into and around it, with a blue liquid flowing through it in transparent tubes threaded around it. She gulped and tried to hold back terrified tears as she slowly peeled back the top part of the bandages near her shoulder. There was a piece of gauze with dried blood strapped round the top that she dared not touch but other than that all she could see was more and more metal, her shoulder a fusion of skin and silver plates. She heard Yeji inhale sharply at the sight and at that moment a sob finally left her lips and her fingers touching her new arm began to shake.

"It's alright." Yeji spoke softly. "Your shoulder must have been too far gone to—"

"Shut up." Ryujin interrupted her harshly, her sobs turning to shouts. "Just drive this damn thing and stop telling me everything's ok."

"But think about it—"

"Just shut up!" She shouted. Yeji gulped and started the engine again, slowly pulling away.

"We need to deal with this calmly." Yeji said after a bit.

"Calmly? Don't you get it? I'm one of them now." Ryujin sat seething. "I belong to them." Her fists tightened into a ball. "I... I've lost. You should have killed me like you promised when I asked."

Suddenly Yeji slammed on the brakes.

"Don't. Say that." she gripped her steering wheel tighter. "You wouldn't be sitting here if it weren't for them. Whether you like it or not they saved your life, and by extension mine as well. I will not sit here and be told that you being dead would be better, because it's a lie. It's a stupid lie you've been told over and over by people who don't care about you. But please listen to me, because I do care about you. Just because you have a metal arm does not make you a monster it makes you a victim. They're all victims. We were never on the 'side of the righteous' like they said. Your life is worth more to me than whether or not you're part machine, do you understand?" By this time Yeji had tears in her eyes and Ryujin's expression had changed from one of anger to confusion and concern.

She wanted to reply, to speak, to say anything. But the words simply didn't come. So they like that, in silence, for a long time as they drove on and on. Winding through ransacked, abandoned settlements and villages.

"Reminds me of home." Ryujin spoke quietly after a while, looking at a dilapidated windmill, its sails torn and dirty, the tower half falling apart.

Yeji hummed in response and nodded her head over at a building next to it. "It's just like Changbin's old house by the green."

"Not much green there." Ryujin replied. "But you're right, that scorched earth over there even looks like the field where we used to play. I swear even the hills in the back look exactly like it did."

"Yeah it... it does." Yeji slowed the truck as they began to drive through the village centre. It was as if it was driving itself and Yeji was merely sitting behind the wheel. She didn't have to think about which direction to go, she just went, like the truck was somehow taking her somewhere. She was taking them somewhere. They passed by an old clock tower with a flagpole crowning the top of it. Hanging limply from the top of the pole was a tattered revolutionary flag. However, the sight no longer seemed to fill Yeji with any sense of pride. In fact right now she felt quite the opposite: sad and remorseful. Eventually, she came to a stop outside a house with half its roof missing and a large chunk of it collapsed. They both sat there in silence, just looking at it.

"Yeji..."

"I... I just." Yeji couldn't finish her thought, getting out of the truck and slowly making her way over to the blackened, charred front door. She looked down to the left of it and saw pieces of a broken plant pot. Bending down she sifted through the dust and soot and found a key exactly where she was expecting to. She picked it up and stared at it gravely.

Placing a hand gently on the wooden door, she pushed on it and it shuddered open, scraping against the rubble lying on the floor. It was all too familiar, the broken cabinet in the corner of the hall, the cracked wallpaper peeling off the walls, the remnants of what was once a staircase leading up to the bedroom. Her bedroom. She could almost hear herself laughing at one of Ryujin's jokes snuggled up under their covers. Talking, when the lights were supposed to be out. Staring out of the window and marvelling at how gold the moon looked before waking Ryujin up to show her.

The sound of the door creaking behind her snapped her out of her memories and she turned to see the very girl she'd been thinking about.

"We're... we're home." Yeji said to her shakily.