Do You Want To Be Trapped

16

Holly

"What would you think about moving in with me?" Gage asks.

Shock hits me in a second. I knew we were getting closer every day, but moving in with him was an enormous step. But when I take a step back, I see that everything we have been doing has been leading up to this. We've spent months growing closer and sleeping over. I mean we all but live together already.

"I think it's the natural next step. But is it what you really want?" I ask. Gage pulls into a parking space at the OBGYN.

"I wouldn't have asked if it wasn't what I wanted, little mama. I want to make sure my girls are taken care of. I plan on asking you to marry me very soon. I'm going to spend the rest of my life with you Holly." His smile makes me return it with one of my own.

"Even if we haven't slept together yet?" I ask.

"Yes, even though we haven't. I want to wait until you're ready. After you filled me in on your relationship with Collin, I knew I wanted us to be different. Holly, a relationship doesn't revolve around sex. It's all about our love. The love my soul gives to yours. When the time comes for us to take that step, I'm going to show what making love really is. What you had with him wasn't love. This is love." He says, motioning between us.

As we stepped out of the car, I saw Collin walking toward us. The appointments had become weekly now that I was nearing the finish line. Collin had been surprisingly easy to work with over the last couple of weeks. He had taken to heart my request for him to think about what kind of relationship he wanted with the baby. I've seen a different side to Collin and I'm hoping it's one that sticks around.

"So Holly you're sitting at thirty-six weeks and that means Etta could show up at any time. We've gone over the birthing plan and it seems everything is in order. I wanted to talk to you about her position today. She's currently in a breach position." Dr. Trigger says.

"What does that mean?" Collin asks.

"The baby is feet first. And she needs to be head first." Gage says.

"That's correct. Now there are times when we do a process called inversion, where we turn the baby while she's still inside. But because of your blood pressure running high at times I don't want to risk that. If she doesn't turn on her own, we will need to do a c-section."

The look he is giving me wasn't one I could take lightly. Dr. Trigger likes to joke around, but sometimes he is serious. The blood pressure issues had been scary at first, but I was learning how to stay calm and not get worked up. The more worked up I get the more it rises. Gage had been a key part of making that happen. He had taken on the role of protector and it was soothing to know that he was there.

"Are you okay with that Holly?" Collin asks.

"As long as she gets here safely that's all that matters."

"You have my number to call me when she goes into labor, right?" Collin asks Gage.

Gage looks at Collin and I saw the slight irritation in his eyes. Gage has tried so hard to be civil, but he can't get over what Collin did to me. Gage thinks Collin is up to something and shouldn't be trusted. I'm still not sure what to think. His history makes me not trust him at all. But I can see how Collin is trying.

"Yes, and your girl's. I won't leave you in the dark." Gage says, and Collin relaxes.

"I just don't want to miss this. I've messed up enough things in life. I don't want Etta's birth to be the next." Collin says and then leaves.

Gage and I get in the car and drive away. I have this nagging feeling that something is bothering Collin other than the birth. But it's not my place to worry about him. I look over at Gage and see he is pensively thinking.

"Penny for your thoughts."

"Do you think he's acting strange lately?" Gage asks.

"I do. Part of me believes he's trying, but another part thinks there's something more going on. I think he's not happy with his life. I don't know if it's Anna or something else." I tell him.

"Have you thought about after Etta gets here? Are you going to let him take her for overnight stays?"

"I have. I'm not letting that happen. Collin knows nothing about children and I won't put my daughter in any position that could be harmful." I tell him.

"You know that if he pushes the fact, I'll stand behind you all the way. The club will too. I know Collin thinks he's got some sway with things, and I don't want you to think you're in this alone. I'll support you no matter what you choose."

"Gage asked me to move in with him." I tell Haven as we sit at home spending some time with each other.

"And what did you say?" She asks.

"Yes." I smile at her, letting the joy of the situation consume me.

"That's actually kinda perfect. I haven't wanted to say anything, but Shepherd wants us to move in together."

Haven looks radiant as she tells me how Shepherd had asked her to move in together. They were planning to once I got settled in my own place. Gage just made it easier for them by asking me to move in with him.

"We haven't set a date yet, but it will probably be before Etta gets here." I stop talking when I feel a sharp pain.

"Holly, what's happening? Are you alright babe?" Haven asks as I continue to feel the pain. I'm leaning over on the sofa trying to catch my breath.

"Just Braxton Hicks contractions. I'll be fine. Dr. Triggers told me I was going to start feeling them." I say.

I stand to go grab a glass of what and as I get upright I feel a gush between my legs. It feels like I've wet my pants, but different from urine. I look down and see my sleep pants are soaked.

"Honey, I think your water just broke." Haven whispers.

"Oh." Is that really all I can think to say?

"But it's too early!" Haven yells.

"It's alright. The doctor said she could safely come at any time. Haven, I need you to calm down and grab my phone." I tell her.

I've always thought it was funny in the movies when everyone but the woman giving birth is freaking out. But now that I'm actually experiencing it I want to smack some sense into her. She hands me the phone and I immediately call Gage.

"Hey little mama. What's up?"

"My water just broke. Can you come and get me?" I ask.

"I'll meet you there. Have Haven drive you and I'll call everyone on the way so they can join us. I don't want you waiting just in case." Gage says.

"She's a little wound up right now." I say, looking at Haven who is trying to calm herself.

"Give her the phone."

I do as he asks and by the reactions she's giving he's giving Haven an ear full. She straightens her spine and looks over at me, nodding her head.

"I'll get her there safely. Yes Gage I swear I won't let anything happen to your girls." Haven ends the call. "Alright, let's slip you on some shoes and grab your bag."

"It's already in the car." I tell her.

"Good, then I'll drive yours. Is there anything else you need?"

I look at Haven like she's some kind of alien. How can someone snap out of something so fast? I don'[t know what he said to her, but I'm glad he said something. I need peace around me as all this starts.

I feel another contraction coming and I tense up. Haven helps put my shoes on and leads me to the car, grabbing my purse along the way. As I sit in the car, it hits me that I haven't felt Etta turn in me. If she's still in the breach position, they are going to have to do the C-section. It's not what I wanted, but I think I will be able to handle it.

"Haven I may have to have the C-section. I'm a little nervous about it. Will you stay there at the hospital with me?" I ask.

For the first time in years, I feel like the little girl who just wants her big sister to be there to protect her. Haven looks over at me and takes my hand as she drives, giving it a squeeze.

"I wouldn't be anywhere else. Like I've always told you, it's you and me, kid. Forever."