EUNOIA

𝗮𝗻𝗴𝗲𝗹𝘀 𝗰𝘂𝗿𝘀𝗲

to love is to be seen. to be seen is to see.

LANA . AETHER . OZZIE

if you'd have told me a year or so ago that i would meet the person i deem to be the worlds greatest, i most likely wouldn't believe a word of what you'd tell me.

if you told me, seven to eight months ago that i'd start dating said person, i wouldn't have believed a single word. if you told me i made it seven months. seven months dating xem, i don't think i could begin to believe it.

🖤

"let me love you, platonically or romantically."

seven months, and i hope more to come. i cherish you deeply and care beyond basic human comprehension for everything you do and everything you tell me. through words and action alike, i hope to learn how to love you more and more each passing day.

when you made your way into my life, you made everything way more bearable. even if i've never told you every little bit of what you've helped me overcome, i hope you know that it's more than anyone's ever helped me with. i hope you know that meeting you, has changed me for the better.

.

bedrotting. something i used to do, daily. all day, even. i was bored and tired of not having anything to look forward to. i was in a bigger shit hole than i am now. showers were hard, brushing my teeth was a pain in the ass, leaving my room felt like being sentenced to another realm. 

i still bedrot but yet, i think i'm slowly healing from it. because you make me want to feel good about myself, and put effort into my health and appearance. you make me feel better about myself already. and i know, i know damn well, i wouldn't have ever made it as far as i have without you tagging along.

i can now get myself out of my wretched bed to shower every day or every other. i can get myself to stand over the sink for three minutes to brush my teeth. i can get out of bed, and get more active now. and you played one of the biggest parts.

most of all, life didn't end back then. because i had finally, found someone worth living for.

..

confidence? i never had an ounce once i started homeschooling. everything i once had deteriorated. i grew tired and unhappy with my voice, body, looks, school work. everything. if you had asked me to show my face or arm or anything, i just couldn't. i wouldn't be able to live with myself if i did.