butchered

the butcher and his knife

Butchering jokes means they stuff up jokes you need to know that otherwise you won't get it (that description is only for people who don't get what butcher means)

Ivan's P.O.V:

I am 23 years old and Great I have one skill set, which is butchering jokes... I swear that I have butchered so many jokes that I am gunna become a butcher one day. Ever since 09, i was 15 at that stage I have been butchering jokes or that's what my siblings(Joshua, Amy, Elise) anyways. And now it is 2017 and I am still butchering jokes. It's annoying how they think I still butcher jokes. Like the other day, last week on a Tuesday I said to my brother that gramma's dead as a September fools day prank and he said straight away "butchered It and that it's not September fools day, it's April fools day" I laughed and said "your kidding right" he replied back to me half-hearted " you idiot, you idiot you're an idiot then started to chuckle as he walked off. My part time job is an engineer for a slaughter house ironically talking about the butchering joke thing

Colin's P.O.V: (Ivan's boss)

I swear if Ivan keeps on talking to himself I will fire that idiot for being incompetent of doing the simple and easy tasks that I give him, he butchers the cows and, butchers the jokes I say, even the ones that he says I should fire him because I don't even like him. I only hired him I because he is so cheap to even hire. I go over to Ivan and tell him a joke "what did one ocean say to the other ocean" Ivan replies half about to burst into laughter "what did the wave say" and I noticed he said it in a dumb tone like an idiot, then I thought to myself oh... Wait he is an idiot then I chuckled. "So what did the wave say" oh sorry, he said nothing... He just waved ha-ha-ha do you get it "no I do not get you boss what do you mean" well I mean that an ocean has waves and oceans can't talk so they just waved do your get it now I asked with a slight hint of why am I talking to the worst engineer in the world. " bwahhh I get that ha-ha-ha that's good boss" then I reply "Arghh"with a hint of Oh My God you just butchered my joke you complete and utter idiot.

Ivan's P.O.V:

Why is Colin looking at me so funnily did I do something good for a change? Although He looks displeased with what I had said to him and he sort of looks enraged at me for...what I think is ruining his joke earlier, I'm am very confused right now so how could I have done something good for a change because he is displeased with me I am no expert but the look on one's face tells a whole story.

3 HOURS LATER

Ivan's P.O.V continued:

I started to think........ finally I am home I swear that I have been at work the whole day and Colin was being a... "Hey you're back from work I was starting to think you didn't like coming home" Lily said interrupting what I was thinking. Don't be silly I love coming home because I get to see you my darling. (I call Lily my darling because she is my wife.)