Never Not [BxB]

03 - perhaps it was just a single moment

4 Months Ago

“Do you think Nate will make it?” A worried pout was etched into Julian's face, he eyed the closed door of the hall. People were crowding most of the space but he made sure to stay stationed at the snack table to have a clear view of the door. Lest the honorary guest walk in when he was distracted.

An annoyed noise left Dominic as he clamped a hand over his friend’s shoulder and reassured him to the best of his ability, “Nathan would rather run a civilian off the road than miss your birthday party. On one hand I think that speaks to his character as a person, on the other hand it means he puts you on a pedestal higher than the rest of the world's population.”  He had raised his voice to the point of shouting to compete with the music playing around them.

Julian couldn’t help but snicker at the imagery of Nate knocking a random person off the road with his motorcycle and then circling back to state that he was in a hurry and they should be careful next time.

“Now that I consider it, he has done a few volatile things in my name.”

Dominic hummed before he remembered that Julian wouldn’t hear him over the music so instead he grabbed two cups of punch and sipped from one while he handed the other to Julian.

Leaning in he spoke, “The point is, he’ll be here no matter what.” Dominic smiled warmly, his kind green eyes sparkling beneath the colorful lights overhead. Julian returned his smile and looked down into his cup of punch, wondering briefly what was keeping Nate up for so long. The older boy worked multiple low-paying jobs and the one he had informed Julian of prior to the party was a sort of graveyard shift at a 24/7 diner. A maximum of two hours had bled into three and Julian had begun to worry.

But it was still his seventeenth birthday and Dominic was probably getting sick of watching him wallow. He skulled down the cup of punch in his hands and grinned at Dominic, “Hey, let’s dance and I can go greet some of the other guests.”

_______

Everyone in the hall was pushing their time past curfew but no one had a single care. Their parents would get over the shock of the disobedience anyway. The music was good and so was the food, everyone knew each other and knew Julian. He was the star of the night, exchanging excited hugs with people from his art classes or old friends from his old neighborhood; sure his smile seemed a little distant sometimes and he danced only for short spurts before drifting subconsciously towards the door, but he was having fun.

Currently, at the peak of the party he stood up on the stage set up at the far end of the hall in front of his birthday cake. A rainbow sprinkles cake with his favorite kind of icing, butterscotch. Dominic and three of his other close friends stood ahead of him herding in the crowd.

Jai and Rina peered at him over their shoulders, both of them looking particularly unimpressed with Julian’s strained smile and fidgeting hands. Jai nudged Rina and whispered into her ear, “Did you call him again?”

Rina rolled her eyes, “Nathan doesn’t answer anyone’s calls when he's out doing shady things. But yeah, I called him. Multiple times.”

“Damn, you’d think he would at least try to be here for the last hour.”

The snide remark came from Carter, a particularly pissed member of Julian’s closest friends. He stalked past both Jai and Rina as he made his way over to Julian’s side.

Everyone knew the importance that Nate held in Julian’s life. But Julian’s closest friends saw the downsides of said importance. It was so great in magnitude that something so special, a birthday that Julian had looked forward to for months, was being dampened by the absence of Nathan.

Despite that fact, everyone watched Julian light his candles and make his wish. The customary off-key rendition of the happy birthday song was sung to Julian who tried his best not to cringe away in embarrassment. Then the festivities continued. The music was amped up louder than before and Julian was swept into a circle with Dominic and Jai having a lame dance-off while Rina tried her best to support them both. And Carter kept Julian close in an attempt to make the miserable daze in his eyes disappear.

Julian held back a sigh as he backed away from his friends and excused, “I’m getting thirsty, anyone else want something?” Jai asked for water as he moonwalked around Dominic. Carter tried to follow but the brunet shook his head with a gentle smile. He really needed a breath on his own. And to loom around the door again.

He had wished that Nate would make it.

Busying himself with getting a bottle of water for Jai and filling a cup with punch for himself, he hadn’t seen the door to the hall swing open letting the sound of cold air and the beginning of a thunderstorm enter as Nate walked in clutching his safety helmet under his arm.

A quick glance up had Julian pausing mid movement. He blinked and wondered if the punch had too much cheap alcohol in it, even mentally calculating how many cups he had and if they were enough to have him hallucinating.

Nate was right there at the door, pushing back his messy dark hair and taking in heaving breaths as his bright but tired eyes strained against the lights in a gaze that was flitting around the room in search of Julian.

At the risk of looking insane, Julian put Jai’s water down and guzzled down his punch before taking off towards Nate.

“Nate!” He called out and the small smile that spread on Nathan’s usually stoic face made Julian incredibly happy. Almost delirious with joy.

The older boy opened his arms for Julian and that. That immense relief he felt as his arms could hold the solid matter of the object of his wish was so perfect and sweet, what else could it be if not infatuation. Nathan had cradled his head and he smelled like diesel and cologne, and the muttered apologies of ‘I know I said an hour’, ‘Forgive me’ were so irrelevant in that moment.

He had wished that he could just see Nate before the night was over and he had been granted his wish.

What more could he ask for?