Never Not [BxB]

04 - silly feelings

Sunday Morning.

As it turned out, Julian could ask for a lot more. But he wouldn't because what he wanted then on the night of his seventeenth was just a hug, and Nate's presence to wrap itself around him in a thick blanket of security. Those innocent little wants had warped after that night, he started to want more than just a hug and presence. He caught himself noticing how tall Nate was in comparison to him, slightly intimidating but it worked when he stared at Nate's lips. The shape of his mouth was pretty and his lips were always a light shade of pink. Nate was fit, his shoulders were broad and his muscles strained underneath his t-shirts whenever he moved. Nate was handsome and his voice was low and deep.

Julian's wants were becoming anything but innocent.

Even now as Nate scrubbed down the dishes after breakfast, Julian watched the muscles in his forearms contract and the veins in his hands rise to the surface of his skin.

"Julian darl, where in the world is your head at?"

He struggled to find his voice as he looked away from Nate and to his mother, "I- I must be- still tired. Uh I drifted a little."

And for the rest of the cozy Sunday morning until he built up the courage to speak to Nate, he drifted off into every memory in recent history when he saw Nate as more than just his best friend.

______

A tradition had begun one day years ago, when Julian discovered an old camera that belonged to his father. He called Nate over to his house and snapped an unexpected picture of him. In the doorway of his room, at age fourteen.

Now, Julian had racked up an entire collection of 'surprise' pictures of Nate. In some Nate was sleepy, in others he would smirk knowingly, the one that Julian held up in the air as they laid on his bed was a favorite of his. He took it the day Nate bought his motorcycle. An expression of pure joy and pride was shimmering in his eyes, he glanced at Julian for a split second and the picture captured everything that Julian loved about his best friend.
"You looked really happy here." He murmured to Nate. The other boy shifted beside him, their shoulders pressed close together and he stared at the picture. Nate hummed and admitted, "I was happy that you were happy."

Julian jerked away and turned to look him in the eyes, "Why? You had finally saved up enough to buy that motorcycle, I'm pretty sure you were on cloud nine."

The older boy let out a soft amused breath, "I remember getting to your house and you losing your mind at the sight of me. You ran back into the house and told me to pose in the meantime," He closed his eyes as if he could be transported back to the memory, "Then you came back with your camera shouting 'I got it! You look so fucking cool!' and your mom looked so shocked that you cussed in front of her and your dad... Seeing you so excited actually made me a lot happier than the motorcycle did."

Julian stared at Nate for a few seconds, a silly smile on his face. "You love that motorcycle though. It's hard for me to believe that you were happier to see me lose my shit."

Nate opened his eyes and looked at him, "A motorcycle doesn't compare to what you mean to me."

Those words from Nate put his feelings into perspective. Maybe his silly feelings weren't so silly after all. Who wouldn't fall for someone who cared so much?