Diaries of a Teenage Hooker

04

"You didn't seem very unwilling a second ago," I muttered, mildly annoyed.

              Yes, I was caught up in the thrill of it; the feeling of having one of those in my mouth was so familiar that it felt natural, but once I'd come down from the high and reality hit me like a slap in the face, it felt wrong.

              "I'm only human, Lea. I let it happen because you initiated it!" he yelled, standing up with his hands in his hair. He looked like he was fighting a battle against himself on the inside. He seemed scandalized, but I knew he liked it.

              I pulled on a fake repentant tone and said, "I can explain."

              He turned back to me. Any hint of satisfaction that was present before was gone now, replaced by a frown that made the entire span of his lips curve downwards. He threw his arms up in the air in an agitated gesture and hissed, "What is there to explain about this? How can you possibly explain why you seduced me?"

              I inhaled deeply and turned my phone on. The message telling me to 'Suck my brother's cock' had been deleted and replaced by a new one that read, 'Such a good girl.'

              Sick bastards. Perhaps, they'd been a blessing before, but after pulling a stunt like this, I wanted to get rid of them. "Here," I said and tossed the phone at him. It was only a split second later that I realized that I should've probably removed the sex tapes, but it was too late too soon.

              I could tell by the way his eyes widened, and the way he inhaled sharply that he'd seen at least one of the videos. And due to my good luck, it just happened to be— "You slept with a teacher! What the hell is wrong with you Lea? Are you crazy? Do you have any idea how much trouble this will get you into?"

              I rolled my eyes, but I couldn't fight back the grin that was setting up camp on my face. "I was set up, okay? At this point, I wouldn't even be surprised if I learn that he was in on it."

              "They're blackmailing you!" he continued, his mouth opening even wider as he scrolled lower. "There's a video of you touching yourself on here."

              "Yes. Women do it too, you know?"

              "Oh goodness, Lea," he dropped the phone, sympathetic eyes trained on me. "I'm so sorry. If I'd known..." he came up to me and hugged me.

              I accepted his hug eagerly. Even though I'd never say it out loud, I was dying for just a little bit of love. The feeling of his chest pressed against mine was comforting, but it felt different this time. It felt more intimate than as brotherly as it would've felt before, had I not been intimate with him.

              I cradled my head in the crook of his neck and inhaled his woodsy smell. "But you can help find them, can't you? You're good with technology."

              He shivered just once, and so quickly that I almost didn't catch it. After that, he seemed to tense up, then he hurriedly pulled away from me with his hands pushed down his pockets. He took a few steps back, seemingly measuring as he quickly moved to create distance between us. It was only then that he looked at me and shook his head slowly.

              "No?" I asked for clarification.

              "I'm sorry. I'm so busy with school that I won't be able to help you find whoever is doing this," he sighed.

              I diverted my gaze to my open palms. They were raw and a little bit tender from me making fists the whole day today. I'd known my parents weren't coming, and it'd made me so angry that I was stupidly lashing out on myself.