Dear Nathan...

Picking Up The Pieces...

Yes, it took a lot of effort, but I'd like to believe that she is now on her way to being okay -- again.

As I often see that she's smiling again and started making new friends again...
I hope she'd keep on moving forward.
I hope that she would continue to see that there's more to life than what she has built around you.

She has not yet been the same old bubbly and carefree girl that she used to be, but I hope someday she'll come around ...

Maybe not just yet ... but I am wishing eventually I will see her like that again.

I really, really miss her, Nathan.

I miss her being bubbly ...
Her random crazy acts ...
Her spontaneity.

She's just not those things anymore.

If I could only undo things for her, then I would already have.

If I only had a magic wand kept in my closet, then I would already have made some magic for her.

But then again -- I don't.

I can of course hope though, that in no time, she'd be able to gather back all the confidence she had in herself before -- when she knew and when she was so sure of what she believed in.
Her smile ... her laughter...
and everything that she lost while she was drowning in her pain...
I would certainly give and do anything just to see her gain everything back again.

I hope this time I would see her really smile -- again...

maybe not that infectious kind that I saw before ... but even just a smile that can warm a heart.

I really am wishing she could smile like that again.

I know, I owe you that peculiar smile though, Nathan.
You were practically the smile that was drawn all over her face ...

And I will never forget the kind of happy that she was, even for just a short period of time.

She was an epitomy of bliss and contentment.

Thanks to you, I have seen her in her happiest self.

And you ought to know ... I really liked you for that, regardless of any or all the mistakes you may have done --

I couldn't really not like you for that.

Anyone who could make her smile like that, I could like for all of my life --- even if only for that sole reason.

I have read that people in our lives came with a purpose...
And that's either to be a blessing or a lesson.

I'm guessing you came with both purposes, to be a blessing and a lesson for her.

The blessing of having someone to share her burdens with, during that crucial moment when she needed to forget about her darkest moment ...

And the lesson of trusting more in actions than in words.

My only wish for now is to see her happy again...

To see her enjoying her life again.

Whatever will make her happier again -- I'll be her very willing support.

I'm so sorry though that she might not want to be your friend -- if you need her to be, right now. She had this to say, when I asked if she could, at least, consider being friends with you at the moment...

"I don't want to be just his friend.
For me, it's going to be all or nothing.
He wants me around -- then he should come and show me that he wants me to stay...
not as a friend but someone whom he loves and didn't want to loose."