Life of a piece of meat

The monster in my nightmares...

Just as Hope is about to sleep she receives a text from Drew pleading her to leave Derek for him she throws the phone on the nearest surface as soon as she sees his name and falls asleep in her man's arms.

Derek notices the text from Drew and raises an eyebrow, but he makes no comment, his focus on the woman in his arms.  He pulls her close, his lips brushing against her forehead as he whispers, “Sleep, my love. Rest now.” 

He slides an arm under her head, gently stroking her hair until her breathing evens out and she slips into sleep. He lays there for a long moment, just watching her, a silent promise in his eyes.  “I’ll protect you, Hope.

Hope has a nightmare she  squirms and mumbles in her sleep trying to fight off the faceless perpetrator in her dreams, this goes for a while until she wakes up checks on Derek and finds him asleep, she kisses between his eyes and goes down stairs to have some water, maybe try to finish a series she was currently watching before going back to bed in a few hours so Derek doesn't notice nor enquire about her absence.

In the stillness of the early morning, Hope’s steps are like whispers, and the only sound that breaks the silence is the quiet click of her turning on the TV.  The glow of the screen fills the darkness, and she settles onto the couch, her eyes fixed on the story unfolding before her.  The drama on-screen offers a distraction from her own, but as the hours pass, her eyes grow heavy, and sleep finally claims her.

This time she has a less frightening nightmare of her future mother in law arranging a gaudy wedding for her and makes Neline her friend's daughter, and the "perfect" bride for Derek in her eyes, her maid of honour.

Even in her slumber, Hope is tormented by the image of Mrs. Hale’s wedding plans—a gaudy display of wealth and poor taste, with Neline standing at Derek’s side as the picture of perfect wife material. 

The dream twists and turns, revealing details of a wedding Hope would never choose for herself—a garish bridal gown, overwrought floral arrangements, an over-the-top cake—all reflecting Mrs. Hale's warped vision of what a wedding should be.

She wakes up to Derek giving her a blank stare, his brows furrowed in concern.  “Hope,” he begins, his voice soft but edged with worry. “You’ve been tossing and turning, and I heard you mumbling in your sleep. You seem troubled. Is everything okay?”  He brushes a strand of hair from her face, his gaze never leaving hers, searching for answers.

She contemplates for a moment before she takes his hands in hers and sits him behind her and tugs at his hands to wrap them around her upper body before deciding to speak "Please don't interrupt me before I'm done because I don't know if I'll have the courage to say this again,

So my mom is actually my step mom, we had some sort of friendship when we were still neighbours with her she'd look after me whenever my father was busy or too tired so he noticed her due to my liking to her so he flirted with her, and they sort of had a situationship for some months until she got pregnant which led to them getting married and officially moving in together.

When I met her I was four years old life was nice until at the age of 9 my father started telling me how much I resembled my beautiful dead mother, at first the touching only happened when he was drunk but over time it became a frequent thing.

When I turned sixteen I started rebelling against him until he stopped because he really values his reputation but as soon as he stopped I started wanting those touches not from him but I wanted them so I started dating merely for the fact that I wanted someone to give me all of that and more but one person wasn't enough so I two timed those guys until college.

Then I met you l thought I'd have to do the same with you but you touch was as respectful as I needed it to be and the same guy could handle me roughly and didn't make me feel bad for my high libido so I got so happy with you, I was posting about everything on social media and started telling my family about you and,

Somehow my father didn't like you so he kept on trying to make me break up with you and one day I was a little tipsy because my sis and I were coming back from a party he forced us to sleep in separate bedrooms only to sneak in mine  later( she sniffles and takes laboured breaths, takes Derek's hand to make it rub her chest before she decided to continue)

I woke up to him kissing between my legs and I tried to deal with the matter quietly but he kept on talking about how he saw my mom in me and how he didn't raise me just to let me go, spoke rubbish about you, about us I-I got upset and started yelling at him my sister and mom had to come to my room to see if all was okay,

I blurted the truth out and my mom didn't believe a word I said she shooed everyone out,  said I was drunk and left... I couldn't take it so I left the following morning my sister is the only one who talks to me because she believes me

but we have to hide it because that man must have fabricated stories to seem innocent and my step mom now thinks I'm the one who wanted to seduce my father and created that scene when he refused she's told my sis all I have to do is apologise to them and all will be forgiven (Hope breaks out into an ugly cry her words coming out slurred) h-how... how do I apo-apologise... (sniffles) when I was wronged (cries)

Derek sits in stunned silence as Hope pours out her heart, the emotional weight of her confession almost too much to bear.  He wraps her more tightly in his embrace, his hands caressing her, providing a safe space for her to finally unburden herself of this secret. 

His face crumples in heartbreak as he hears the story unfold, his eyes burning with rage at the man who could betray a daughter’s trust in such a way.

"Hope,” he whispers, his voice thick with emotion. “Oh, Hope Im so sorry my love"
She just continues crying until she ends up having a panic attack, having difficulty in breathing, her veins popping out and everything blurring but there's no stop it just keeps going making her head hurt even more,

As Hope spirals into a panic attack, Derek springs into action, lifting her gently from the couch and moving with her to the floor.  He positions her so that she’s resting on her side, her breathing the focus of his attention.  “Shhh,” he whispers, his hands stroking her hair, his touch gentle but firm.  “I’m here, Hope.  Just focus on my voice.

"I-I c-can't br..." she stutters her eyes out of focus. “Shh,” he repeats, drawing her closer, nestling her against his chest.  “You’re safe, Hope.  You’re safe with me.”  He rocks her gently, his lips against her temple, his arms wrapped around her in a comforting embrace. 

“Take a breath.  That’s it.  Just one breath.  I’ve got you, Hope.  You’re not alone.  I won’t let you go.  Breathe with me, love.  Breathe.”
“Pr-pro-promise”
“I promise,” Derek repeats, his voice steady and sure.  “I promise I won’t leave you.  I promise to keep you safe, no matter what.  I promise to love you, no matter what.  You are my everything, Hope.  You are my heart, my soul.  And I will never, ever let you go.”

He plants another kiss against her temple, his hand moving to her chest, coaxing her to match his breathing.  “We can do this together, Hope.  Just breathe.”

[ a while after  she calms down, there's silence and the tension gets so thick that she abruptly gets out of his hold, runs upstairs to a guest room, locks it and hides under the covers not knowing what to do.

'How will he react now, will he see me the same, does he even believe me, should I just start looking for a new place to live and try to forget, it'll be hard yes but how do I face him now' her thoughts are so loud she barely feels the need to open her mouth.

She slaps herself in tiny, “wow Hope way to go should have at least married him before telling him this, I guess I should get one of those dildos that come with a body now no regular dildo will do after him.”