Prologue/Chapter 1 -Just the beginning-

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"Just the beginning"


She tucked in the kids for bed then headed upstairs, she lit her blunt like usual and turned on "friends". She spent most of her nights alone. Not because she was a single mom but because her husband was always working. Even when he wasn't.

He was never really present or there in the moment. The times he was, he wanted to climb on top of her. When she allowed it, which wasn't often. He didn't make it enjoyable for her. It wasn't passionate and he didn't take his time to explore her body and be intoxicated by the moans she'd make. No, he was in and out like a teenage boy who wanted nothing more than to come and get back to his video games or television shows.

She wasn't the clingy type, but she did crave intimacy. Not only sexual but emotional and intellectual intimacy. She would try to connect with him sometimes on nights she actually saw him but it was usually met with silence or with misunderstanding of any of her conversations. She'd accept defeat and go back to the show or book of the night until she was tired and went to bed.

She did love him, yes she did. But she wasn't sure sometimes exactly why. They had their moments and their good days. Sometimes they were funny and playful, they'd agree on some things, and they raised their kids together in agreement on most subjects.

With all that said, she just couldn't see past the fact that their sex wasn't fun or joyful anymore. It was routine and most times she didn't even come. She couldn't connect to him anymore. If she was drunk enough, she'd enjoy herself but it wasn't an all the time kind of thing. She wanted him to take his time. Kiss her slowly, caress her thighs & breast. Touch her in that special place that will send her over the edge to pleasure. She just had to accept the fact that he wasn't like that regardless, even if she had asked him countless times to take his time and play with her a bit before he'd just jam it in her and it done with it.

Like I said before she did love him. She just didn't know if it was love or love out of obligation.

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