Over and Over.

Glass shatters against the wall, as the girl screams.

 -

Over and over she had asked herself, when would this get better?

From a young age, Mikan never had it great.

How could she have it okay? Her mom was all she had growing up.

It was hard to really even consider her a "mother", but Mikan thought otherwise. How could she not? I mean, her mom was there for her on special occasions when she couldn't take it anymore.

Her mom was by her side, to scream in her face about how she's fucked up.

 -

Helpful, right?

 - 

As time went on, things never really seemed to progress in their relationship. It was hard to, when she could never mentally feel okay. She tried over and over to make herself feel alright.Her wrists were sore, and her throat was stinging but...If it distracts her from some pain, it's worth it. Right?

Throughout middle school and high school, all she ever went through was bullying. She was clumsy, to say the least.If you aren't perfect, you can never be loved or even considered to be noticed in such a positive manner.She tried countless times to put herself out there but the more the kids shouted, the more she stuttered and stood back.

Bruises tended to cover her arms and legs. Not from all the fall's she had taken, but from the cruel kids who could never seem to catch a break with laying their hands onto her.She hated physical touch, yet over time...she craved it. It was hard but she learnt to love any sort of hands on her.

Sure it hurt but...what did that matter?

-

Thing's never seemed to progress until she met Enoshima.The Ultimate "fashionista" as some would call her, during the time.

A woman who was glorified for her perfect shape not only to her hips but throughout her entire body. The definition of who she wished she could be.Junko seemed loving. Maybe she could replace the mother she never had? Maybe Junko would be willing to be the one to love her, and tell her that she'll make it out of this? For once, she felt loved. Which ended up being her biggest mistake.

-

Coming back to present time, Mikan finds herself shaking and crying. The glass that once was full, was now spilled. The little shards covering all around her feet.-Could this be considered walking on pins and needles? 

 - 

 She doesn't understand what she had done wrong. All Junko ever seemed to scream and physically let her know she wasn't enough. She would scream about how she's done something wrong. Scream about how imperfect she was. Scream about how her presence just annoyed and bothered her so much.

 -

It hurt.

 -

Badly.

 -

Mikan walked into this new life, thinking somebody had truly wanted her. Instead, she only ended up being used and led into a similar yet worse lifestyle than she had before.

Why her?

Why Mikan?

Why was she stuck in this never ending cycle of torment and abuse?

Her mind tried to convince herself that it was okay but deep down, she knew she was just bullshitting it.Mikan doesn't care to even fight back.

Her breaths become more shaky and broken, letting herself fall to the ground with her hands over her face. Letting the little pieces impale her legs.

 -

No physical pain could ever begin to match the pain that tore apart her mind.