Change for me | Bbangsaz

Derealization

Minji's POV

I stared at the ceiling lying down in my bed.
This is the only thing I've been doing for the past 3 hours or so. I'm not sure though I lost count awhile ago.

This is basically what happens if I don't do some type of drug to help me sleep, which I haven't. I get stuck in my mostly negative thoughts and this is the time were life just doesn't feel real anymore.

I kept thinking back on the argument between me and Hanni. I didn't mean to yell at her but when she started talking like a privileged bitch something just snapped in me. I was already pissed about everything and I just took my anger out on her.

I was taken out of my thoughts when my door suddenly busted open, and there stood my dad.
"Minji, get the fuck up. Gotta talk to you." He called out before walking off.

I groaned when the pain on the right side of my stomach came back. I sat up slowly looking down at my stomach, Hanni didn't do a bad job with it at all. I stood up trying to bear the pain and put on a random sweatshirt I found on the ground.

I slowly walked out of my room going into the living room where my dad is. "Dad? What is it?" I said leaning against the wall looking at him.
He was sitting at the table with a beer can and some papers.

"Where's my money? From Hyunjin?" He asked looking up from the table and in my direction.
Shit. I looked down at the ground before speaking up, "I don't have it." I said in a low voice.

I kept my head down when I heard the chair scraping against the floor and his footsteps growing near. "What the fuck do you mean you don't have it? I told you to meet up with him." His tone grew louder.

"I did, but-" I was cut off when his fist slammed the wall besides me. "Look at me when your talking, show some damn respect." I quickly tilted my head up looking at him as my nose got a strong smell of alcohol and cigarettes. I unconsciously scrunched my nose in disgust but was immediately met with the back of his hand to my cheek.

"Oh don't give me that face like your much fucking better!" He yelled in my face as I groaned from the pain. "You know what, you're exactly like your fucking mom. Two useless bitches." He scoffed before walking off and sitting back at the table.

My eyes furrowed at the way he talked about her. He made me want to get a bat and beat the fuck out of him. But I can't because my dad is the only person in the world who fucking terrifies me.

"I don't know what the fuck you did with my money but I need it by tomorrow." As soon as he said that and got back to drinking I was quick to storm off, tears stinging in my eyes. I closed my door and sat on the bed trying to push back the tears.

I have about 50 dollars on me and I was supposed to be getting 300 from Hyunjin. It was a bigger deal than usual, I guess why he decided to steal from me.

The only option I have is selling leftover drugs to some kids and school even though I was originally planning to stay home. After a bit of contemplating life I got up and went to the bathroom. I turned on the shower and stared at myself in my mirror.

I softly touched the bruise forming on my cheek sighing as I took off all my clothes, hopping in the shower. I tried to prevent water from touching the stiches as much as I could because fuck it would hurt.

After a long and mostly painful shower I stumbled out and checked to make sure I didn't mess up the stitches. I walked out the bathroom and went to my room sitting on the bed. I picked up the phone and read the time. "6:50"

I took my time getting ready putting on some black jeans with a black shirt then topping it off with a black leather jacket. If it wasn't obvious already most of my closet is full of black clothes and I love it.

I grabbed my bag and stuffed in some bags of weed and some pills before slowly walking out my bedroom. I could hear snoring from the living room so I made sure to tiptoe missing all of the creaks in the wood. I stared at my dad for a second looking at him sprawled over the couch with empty beer cans.

I fucking hate him.

Hanni POV

After last night I took a long shower and tried to forget everything. But I mean who was she talk acting like she knew everything about me? I guess Danielle was right about Minji. She texted me asking about how the night went but I decided to ignore her not wanting to talk about it.

I was getting ready for school now, just finishing my makeup. I made my way downstairs as the smell of pancakes filled my nose. My mom was in the kitchen while my dad was sitting at the table reading the newspaper.

They both didn't acknowledge me as I sat down at the table. I pulled out my phone scrolling on tiktok as my younger brother, Matthew came running down. And of course my parents faces lit up at the angel.

I sighed as I suddenly lost my appetite, I stood up from the table doubting they would even notice me until my mom spoke up. "Hanni! Not getting breakfast?"

I turned around and nodded before rushing out of the house. I really didn't want to deal with my family right now or anyone at that. I hopped in my car and drove off to school.

Once I was there I started walking towards the door before I saw I made eye contact with Danielle and she began making her way towards me.

"Hanni, you weren't answering my texts last night." She said walking besides me.

"I know, so much happened last night and I went straight to bed once I got home." I said as we walked into the school heading to our lockers. "Come on, fill me in!" Danielle exclaimed very curious.

"I'll explain everything later, class is about to start. I'll see you later though." I said desperately not wanting to talk about it. I stuffed my things in my locker before saying goodbye to Danielle as we went out separate ways. We only have a few classes together so I don't see her too much throughout the day.

2 periods later

I walked into history, the class with Minji and the project. I was surprised to see Minji in class early. I walked over to her sitting down in my seat. I glanced at her a few times and noticed a bruise on her cheek. That wasn't there when I left her house, but I didn't want to ask I was still salty about last night.

About halfway into the lesson I looked over at her, she was facing forward with her usual manspreading except her leg was bouncing at an almost abnormal rate. I noticed her hand also very visibly shaking.

What the fuck's up with her?

I guess Minji noticed me staring with a concerned expression when she suddenly raised her hand. I looked away from her as the teacher started talking. "Yes Minji?"

"Can I go to the bathroom?" Minji said with a weak tone. The teacher sighed before nodding and Minji quickly took off.

Something told me to go check on her so a bit after Marlow left I raised my hand also asking the teacher. "Come on what is up with you guys and the bathroom? Make it quick Hanni,"

I flashed a slight smile before leaving the classroom after and heading to the bathroom. I slowly entered the bathroom and noticed Marlow hunched over the sink. Seriously what is up with this girl?