Let Me Protect You (Sahyo)

Chapter 15

Just realised, "LET ME PROTECT YOU" has reached 2.2k views. Thanks to all the readers. Sahyo nation we rise.... Love you'll 😇

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When Sana's eyes opened again, Jihyo was still safely tucked in her arms. She could see the clock on the bedside table reading twelve noon, and could already feel the grumble of her stomach protesting at its emptiness. 

Although Jihyo wasn’t facing her, Sana could feel the rise and fall of her stomach with her breaths, and knew that the girl was awake.

“Feeling better?” Her voice was soft next to Jihyo's ear. She felt a small nod, before nudging her to turn around. Now that they were just centimeters apart, she could see every twitch in Jihyo's face, the way her smile slowly reached her eyes.

“Don’t you dare.” Sana said, when she saw the apology forming on Jihyo's lips. “I will really get mad at you if you say it.”

“I just wanted to explain.” Jihyo pouted, shoving jokingly at her girlfriend’s shoulder. “Need to tell you this.”

She took a long inhale, more to stall time for herself than anything. 

“I was seeing a department-mandated therapist after all that happened. A monthly thing I did, but it kinda helped a little. The nightmares were less intense, and the therapist made me actually talk things out instead of repressing the hell out of it like I always do.” 

Sana heard an unspoken ‘but’, raising her brows to encourage her to continue.

“But then when I thought I’d moved on, it all came back.” 

“It’s because of me, isn’t it?” Sana asked, recalling Chae's reaction when she asked her about Jihyo's nightmares the first time. 

“It’s not because of you, silly.” Is it not? “Maybe a little. But the nightmares started back up when I realised I liked you, and started caring for you. Maybe I’m more than a little afraid of the same thing happening again.”

Sana could tell from how Jihyo was physically unravelling the words from her heart, baring her soul in a way she hadn’t done before, that this was her choosing to be vulnerable in front of someone she trusted irrevocably. So naturally she knew how important it was to hold those words carefully in her hands, and give back just as much gentleness as the moment needed.

“There’s nothing to be afraid of, and even if there is, I’m not scared. I feel the safest when I’m with you. Even at the start, when we weren’t on the best terms, I still looked to you to feel safe. And not just because you’re my bodyguard.”

Jihyo let the words bounce around in her head. She’d gone through therapy before, she’d heard what the therapist had to say, tried internalising a lot of it. But there were still bad thoughts that nagged away at her, regardless how much she tried to change her mind on it. Now that she’d heard Sana's iteration of those words, she felt that maybe it would finally stick.

“Can I see it?” Sana asked, after a bit of comfortable silence passed between them.

“Huh?”

“You said the bullet hit your shoulder.” 

Oh. Jihyo didn’t think of the scar as anything more than a reminder of how painful it could be to lose someone, but when Sana helped her shrug her shirt off her shoulder and laid her lips on the scarred skin, her breath caught in her throat. 

Her kiss was almost reverent, like a sombre acknowledgement of the baggage that Jihyo carried with her, and selflessly accepting every bit of it nonetheless.