Strawberries and Cigarettes

Kabanata 6

Kabanata 6

Naghihikab akong bumaba sa hagdanan namin. I was woken up by the feeling of thirst but my tumbler is empty kaya kahit inaantok ay napabangon ako sa uhaw. Tumingin ako sa wall clock sa aming ding ding. Alas tres ng madaling araw na pala. Nilipat ko ang mga mata sa open window sa salas at nakitang madilim pa at malakas ang ulan, hindi na tumigil simula kanina. Lumiko na ako papunta sa kusina at nagulat ng makitang andoon din pala si mommy. Babatiin ko sana siya ng madinig kong may kausap ito.

"Wala na kong choice noon Grace! My credit is messed up and no bank is willing to trust me! Wala akong malapitan noon kung hindi sila!" Mommy said problematically. Nakasapo sa kanyang palad ang ulo habang nakatingin sa cellphone niyang nasa countertop. She's talking to her best friend and to my ninang, tita Grace.

"The debt that Mico left me milked me dry. I had no choice Grace." Mommy said. I froze when I heard daddy's name.

"Lienne, you should've asked me for help. Alam mong lagi akong handang tulungan kayo at mga inaanak ko. Hindi ka na dapat pa lumapit sa mga iyon!" Tita grace said through the phone. Mommy signed and drank straight from the bottle of wine she's holding... I've never seen her drink this much. Nagsimula akong kabahan.

"At ano Grace? At ano? Mag-aaway na naman kayo ng asawa mo dahil sakin?" Ani mommy. Nadinig ko ang pag buntong hininga ni tita Grace. The other line went quiet.

"Grace ayoko ng makagulo sa inyo. The restaurant is doing good now, kahit papaano. Uunti-untiin ko. Hanggang makabayad ako sa kanila." Malungkot na ani mommy.

"It will take the restaurant 10 years to earn that. And we both know those men are not generous! They will not wait." Tita Grace said worriedly but sternly. Tila nagbababala, mas lalo akong kinabahan.

"I know." Mommy said. My eyes started to water looking at her defeated form.

"Has any of their men went up to you again after they talk to you last month."  Ani tita Grace.

"No. Wala namang humanap sakin. But the Don called me. Para kong nanginig Grace! He's asking for his money. No—he's demanding for it. Wala akong maisagot." Mommy said with anguish.

"No one is more proud and conceited than them. It's an open secret that they run the underground of manila. Kung iisipin wala lang sa kanila yang inutang mo para ipitin ka nila ng ganito. But that's just who they are. Cruelty runs in their family." Dagdag ni tita Grace.

"I was given until next month to pay. Ibibigay ko muna ang lahat ng ipon ko dito. I hope that will please them enough to give me more time." Dagdag na ani mommy.

"Sana Liene. Sana. Alam naman nating dalawa kung gaano sila kalala. Ang sakanila ay sakanila, minsan ay pati ang sayo ay sakanila na din! Hay. I know it's too late pero sana ay hindi ka nalang talaga na involved pa sa mga Alva—." I watched as mommys' eyes widened when she saw me standing at the entrance of our kitchen. She quickly dropped the call, stopping tita Grace from speaking. I looked at mommy, eyes brimming with tears.

"Mommy." Hikbi ko. Quickly running to her and hugging her.

"Bakit hindi mo sinabi? Sana hindi na ko nag-aral sa Ateneo! Sana pinangbayad nalang natin yung tuition ko!" Parang batang sambit ko. Hinimas ni mommy ang likod ko.

"I didn't tell you because I never wanted you to know Berry. Because this does not concern you, this is my responsibility. As your mother." Ani mommy na nagpalakas ng iyak ko.

"The restaurant is doing good, isn't it? They love your cakes! We'll be able to pay in no time!" Ani mommy bago ibangon ang luhaan kong mukha at hinarap sa kanya.

I can see the tears around her eyes that she didn't allow to fall. She looks as strong as the woman who aimed a knife at my father to get me unto her arms. Mas lalo akong naiyak. My mommy...