Bungo Stray dogs : Dazai's Entrance Exam - Light Novel 1

Chapter 4

The thirteenth.
I returned home after a lengthy absence and now pen these pages.
A life's worth of fear were instilled into this single day.
It is due to the efforts of myself and my colleague that several persons narrowly escaped the jaws of death, yet be that as it may, not all share this lucky fate.
Thus is the state of reality. The problem emerges from reality itself. If we were to break away from the realm of the real, then some problem-riddled human world would surface. It would be a reality such that no man would be capable of change. Ergo reality must depend on both the facts of our births and our deaths. We know this reality to be the truth.
We can view this other reality lacking death only in our own minds.
And thus the series of cases drew to a close.
The Agency and I worked to deal with the aftermath. We were subjected to inquiries from the city police, damage reports from the insurance agencies, and the clamoring press. The office was swamped in a mountain of work. We were so busy we didn't have the slightest bit of time to be lost in sentimentality.
Perhaps sensing the volume of work, Dazai abandoned all his usual duties and vanished on the pretense of "investigating something". He was going to get it the minute I found him.
The victim of our last case was an airplane and its large cargo of civilian passengers. Once it was reported that a foreign terrorist group was responsible, tracking down the group's ringleader was added to our list of duties as well.
We received quite a bit of praise for defending the country against an unprecedented tragedy, but there was still much public outcry for us to be held accountable for our inaction in the first case. I supposed the criticism from the death of the kidnapping victims would fade in time.
One day after finishing the usual elephantine quantity of reports, I was called into the president's office.
"Excuse me," I said, stepping in.
The president did not look up from the paperwork spread across his desk. "How goes the work?" he asked.
"I'm still buried up to my eyeballs in it. To make matters worse, that fool Dazai ran off again. He can't abide paperwork, so he delegated it all to the office staff and is now probably off investigating for the police. He deserves to be pushed into a vat of boiling water. If he lives, good. If he doesn't, all the better."
All the president said was, "Don't get caught." He gathered up his papers and stored them in an envelope before looking up at me. "You did well. You earned a certificate of merit from the general of police. 'A paragon of detective work for our city', he says. It is a weight off my shoulders as well. For a time, I considered closing the agency."
Oh my.
Before I could say anything, the president continued. "No business exists more precious than the human life. And if the Agency's existence were to encroach upon a life - but that matter is now resolved. By your doing, Kunikida." He pointed at my forehead.
The president never shared his personal anxieties with anyone; perhaps he was exhausted.
"And now. Did you complete your assignment?"
My assignment. The entrance exam.
Dazai's judgment with which the president had tasked me.
"I've already made my decision," I said. "That man is the worst. He ignores my orders, wanders off in the middle of jobs, obsesses over suicide, womanizes, detests labor of any kind, and shirks all his office duties. He is charismatic to an extent that he is an utter misfit. He wouldn't last three days in another job without being shown the door."
Here I paused and recited the words I had already planned on saying.
"But as a detective, Dazai is the most able gifted man I know. I imagine that it won't even be a few years before he is one of the greatest detectives our agency has to offer. He – passes."
"Very well. Your judgment is sound."
The president signed the new hire paperwork and stamped it with his seal. It was official – Osamu Dazai was now a member of the Armed Detective Agency.
"While I'm here," I said, "Could I possibly ask for the afternoon off?"
"By all means, take it. What for?"
"Just a small piece of business."

I turned off a small path winding through a grove to a small graveyard overlooking the bay.
The graves dotting the slope shone white in the moonlight. I picked my way among them until I stopped at one more recently erected than the rest. I laid a bouquet of flowers upon it and pressed my palms together in prayer over the grave.
"Visiting the grave of some poor soul, Mr. Kunikida?" a clear voice asked.
When I opened my eyes, I saw Miss Sasaki, clad in a white kimono, standing beside me cradling a bundle of white chrysanthemums. She placed her flowers next to mine and bowed her head.
"The kimono suits you," I said.
"It is suitable for mourning, but I do regret we have not met upon a happier occasion than this. ... Mr. Kunikida, do you habitually leave flowers upon the gravestones of those whom passed away during your cases?"
The grave she and I both stood before belonged to one of the victims of the kidnapping case in the abandoned hospital.
"Yes," I said. "I don't have a particular reason for doing so, other than that I feel I should."
She neither agreed nor disagreed with me but simply smiled. The leaves on the nearby trees danced in the sea breeze.
I continued talking as if I was alone. "... The first time anyone died on one of my jobs, I wept so hard I wasn't able to get up and go to work. I still don't think I've fully recovered. But the tears don't come anymore. All I can think to do now is that I ought to visit their graves instead. At the very least, if I didn't do this, the dead would not be able to rest in peace."
"Do you... do you suppose they could rest in peace if you wept for them?" she asked.
"I don't know. Perhaps they will pass on peacefully, or perhaps they are already beyond hope. My tears and prayers can't reach them. Time has already stopped for them. All I can do is grieve their passing. That all the living can do is grieve for the dead is the sole fact which makes me believe we live in a proper world."
"... You're a cruel man, Mr. Kunikida."
I turned to look at her and was astonished to find tears glistening in her eyes.
"I... lied to you earlier. When I said I broke up with my boyfriend, it was... death itself which separated us. My boyfriend was a man who burned for his ideals. He did so much for me... and yet he died alone, without a single word of love to me."
A compassionate person would have been able to respond with some comforting phrase, but all I could do was produce the meaningless platitude, "I'm sorry to hear that."
"The dead are cruel cowards," she said. "You are absolutely right, Mr. Kunikida. Time has stopped for him, and thus my loved one can no longer embrace happiness nor laughter. Oh – I am so tired of it." Her eyes could no longer hold back her tears, and a river of them surged down her cheeks.
If there lived a wise man who knew everything in the world, would he have known the words to dry her eyes?
Certainly, I did not know them. I pursued my ideals, filled whole notebooks with them, and withstood anything to implement them. And yet there I stood, wondering if there were really no perfect words for her or perfect salvation for all the world's problems. For all of my efforts, I was powerless in the face of a crying woman.
"Excuse me," she hiccupped. "I'm afraid I lost my composure.... I, I had best be on my way."
"Will you be all right?" I asked. God, what a foolish question.
"Yes," she said. "Actually, the police has left me this case to me as an outside consultant. I am an expert in this field and since this case is rather complex... From here on out, you had best arrange your business with the case workers."
It was a matter of course that any outside consultant of the police would be a superior individual. Even allowing for solving cases with collaborative help, they must have had quite track record to begin with.
"Then I shall be sure to turn to you if I become stuck in my work," I said.
"Yes, by all means." Finally, Miss Sasaki smiled.
The ocean wind blew in over the horizon and caressed the mountain ridges as it passed.
Miss Sasaki left with a silent bow. After watching her go, I stared off at the scene of Yokohama below without actually seeing it.
Suddenly, my cellphone rang. It was Dazai.
"Kunikida, could I have you come here for a minute?"
His tone was surprisingly dark.

"What's going on?" I asked.
Dazai had called me out to the abandoned hospital of our very first case together.
What was an eerie, unsettling hospital in the dead of night was no more than an ordinary faded, run-down building in the light of day. Sunlight slanted in through the broken windows of what was probably once a sick room, forming bright white patterns on the floor.
"How do you remove the safety on this gun?" Dazai asked. He carried a handgun as if it was unfamiliar to him. The gun itself was a small company gun with double columns. Agency members were allowed to carry one just like it at all times.
"Did you make me come all this way just to ask that?" I grumbled, exasperated, as I removed the safety.
Dazai aimed the gun at a patch of empty space and said, "I really don't think any of those arm dealers were the Azure Apostle."
What?
"Don't you think?" he continued. "They weren't responsible for any of the other cases. They don't have any motive either."
"Well, I was told a motive – namely that we were an obstacle to their importing weapons into Yokohama."
"That's true. And that's what they themselves believed. But why did they have to think that?"
"... What are you driving at?" I asked.
"They viewed the Agency as a threat because of the Azure King case," Dazai said. "But the Agency is by no means the only organization that resists illegal arms dealing. Think of the police, the coast guard, or the Special Abilities Department. Why did none of them receive the same treatment we did?"
"Tell me what you came up with."
"Someone warped their perception of us. Rather, someone fed them information which led them to overestimate us as their worst enemy."
No. Could it be?
Could it be the Azure Apostle had pulled the strings on yet another case?
"Dazai. Tell me. Do you already know who is responsible?"
"Yup."
"Then who are they?!" I grabbed him by the collar without thinking.
Dazai's facial expression never wavered as he looked me straight in the eye and said, "I sent an email to bring them here. I told them we had proof connecting them to their crimes, that sort of thing. I expect they'll be here shortly."
What did he just say?
I took a quick glance around the room.
I figured it had once been a sickroom, a very ordinary sort; there was a door before me and a window behind me. Two decrepit bed frames for hospital beds stood in front of me next to an empty medicine cabinet. The room was otherwise empty. The floor was even relatively free of dirt and debris. The true criminal was coming here? To this empty room?
Dazai suddenly remarked, "Footsteps."
I reflexively looked to the door.
I could hear them: the sounds of feet plodding on the floor, slowly growing nearer.
I noticed Dazai clutching the gun. Was this why he had it?
My own gun had already been returned to the president. I would have to make a gun from my notebook – but no, there wasn't time enough for that.
A trail of sweat trickled down my cheek.
The footsteps were close. They were almost here.
In the doorway materialized a leg, then a torso, then a face I knew well-
"Whatcha doing here, Specs?"
The young man standing before me – he was -
"Why... why are you here?" I asked.
"I asked you first. Come to find out the truth?"
He was the boy hacker, Rokuzou.
You're the true criminal?
You're the Azure Apostle?
My mind automatically leaped into action. If Rokuzou truly was responsible for this, then he could have possibly remotely controlled Dazai's computer in order to send the emails. No, even before that, Rokuzou was the one who planted the seeds of doubt about Dazai in my mind.
Additionally, contacting a foreign criminal organization and feeding them biased information was not outside the realm of possibility for a skilled hacker.
And above all else – he had a motive.
A reason to detest the Agency.
A reason to detest me.
"Why, Rokuzou?" I asked. "Is this my fault? It is, isn't it? It's my fault your father died, so you must resent me for it."
"I resent the man who killed my dad," he said. "That's only fair, yeah? But Specs-"
Dazai suddenly spoke up. "Oh, I see now. Rokuzou, did you snoop into my email?"
What?
Didn't Dazai say he had sent an email to the true criminal?
And just then.
A gunshot.
A hole opened in Rokuzou's chest. Blood sprayed out of it.
He opened his mouth, but nothing came out as he collapsed to the ground at my feet.
Someone had shot him. I immediately looked at Dazai, but his gun still lay limp at his side. His face was frozen in place.
Then I heard a voice from the entranceway, behind Rokuzou's prone body. It said, "Pray forgive me... Mr. Kunikida."
Her figure appeared in the doorway.
Long, black hair. A slender neck. A white kimono.
In her hand was a gun, a stream of white smoke rising from its barrel.
She stepped over Rokuzou's body and walked towards me.
The great mystery of it all was that she was still utterly beautiful.
"Are you the Azure Apostle?" I asked. My voice sounded to me like it belonged to someone else.
"Yes," she said. Her voice was so frigid it chilled my eardrums.
Dazai said, "Sasaki, this entire plan is yours. You... do admit to this, don't you?"
"Mr. Dazai," she responded, "I must ask that you grant me one request. Please... drop the gun. Or else-" She pointed her gun at him.
"I'll drop it," he said, "if you allow me to ask you some questions."
"That I do not mind. I shall answer them all."
"All right. Here, I'm dropping it."
Dazai casually let the gun fall to his feet where it hit the floor with a clatter.
"Sasaki, why did you target the Agency?" he asked.
"Why, I believe you already know the answer to that, Mr. Dazai."
"Well, you're right. You tried to hide it from us, but your mind moves at a pretty brisk clip, doesn't it? No wonder you're a respected researcher in the world of criminal psychology at your age."
Dazai continued as if he had surrendered. "You did two things: executing criminals and taking revenge on the Agency. Is that correct?"
Executing criminals? That was just like-
"It was... the only method I could come up with," she admitted.
"So you had a reason for your revenge, I take it?"
"Mr. Dazai, all revenge is pointless in our society. And yet... there was nothing else I could have done. I understood the flaw in my reasoning, as my revenge was for the sake of a dead man, but I had to or else I would have lost myself."
Revenge?
Our Agency cultivated a good reputation. I couldn't think of anyone with complaints against us warranting revenge.
"I see. Even though you knew it was pointless, you had to have revenge anyway. And to your sorrow, there was no one else whom you ought to have revenge on."
Death itself separated us.
He was a man who burned for his ideals.
"You were powerless as an individual. But you had your intellect and a great knowledge of criminology. With these two tools, you had taken countless criminals to justice. Therefore the Azure Apostle incidents were critical to you, weren't they?"
Dazai paused, and I realized the truth at the same moment as he said it.
"Everything you've done was a battle of revenge for your deceased boyfriend – the Azure King."
The Azure King.
The extraordinary terrorist whose crimes brought other criminals to justice.
The very man whose whereabouts the Agency discovered, leading to his death.
"One of the rumors floating around says the King had an accomplice. His crimes were just a little too perfect, you see. But, disregarding any hired thug, no criminal shared the King's ideologies, or so the authorities thought. Such coordinated crimes normally require the cooperation of a whole faction of conspirators or else a group bought for a fortune. Yet the Azure Flag Terrorist incident showed no sign of either of these. Somehow no one ever imagined the Azure King's girlfriend was a far better strategist than he was himself."
"He... was a noble man. This unstoppable villainy wounded him dearly. He searched in vain for an ideal, beautiful society free from oppression. He knew he could not save everyone through current legal recourse, so he became a bureaucrat in order to create new legislation." Sasaki spat the next words out like she had a lump in her throat. "The system's vices, his meddling colleagues, and his superior's lack of sympathy agonized him. His failures agonized him. Even I, from my position as a bystander, could see this road to justice was paved with knives, and he walked it barefoot. One day, he finally broke. He lost faith in all his ideals and was on the verge of slitting open his own stomach in suicide.  All I wanted... was to never see such pain in his eyes again, and thus I had no choice but to tell him my plan."
Crime as a wicked judgment.
The road to ideals paved with bloodshed and carnage.
"Sasaki," Dazai asked, "you came up with almost every aspect of the Azure King's attacks, didn't you? For the sake of your loved one."
"I do not regret it," she said. "His ideals are mine as well. If he will reap the reward, then I shall become the Devil himself for his sake."
"But the Azure King is dead. The Agency tracked him down, and he blew himself up along with that boy's father. It could have all ended there."
"No, I could not let it end. My plan was but half complete. There were still criminals awaiting judgment. And... oh, you'll ridicule me, no doubt, but I simply couldn't bear to do nothing in the face of his death."
"So you made a plan to have the remaining criminals voluntarily commit more crimes in order for the Agency to be the ones to bring them to justice. And by threatening us with a scandal to motivate us, you ensured the arrest of these criminals without you ever having to lift a finger."
The taxi driver who committed multiple kidnaps without ever leaving a trace.
Alamta, the undocumented bomb maker running loose in Japan.
The group of arms dealers who secretly smuggled weapons and participated in the black market organ trade.
Each and every one of them nearly impossible to persecute otherwise.
"The most glorious aspect of this plan," Dazai continued, "is that it required you to do nothing illegal. I imagine you had the arms dealers set up the surveillance equipment and execute Alamta for you. You didn't participate at all. I bet that every single thing that group did was based around whatever you wanted them to do. That's why there's no evidence of your actions. They never once thought that you, their informant, were intentionally manipulating these situations to your will. And that's why no matter how the authorities investigate it, they'll only come to the conclusion that it was all a mistake in the group's intel."
I felt the same way I had when we had tracked down the kidnapper and when I had interrogated Dazai: This criminal will not dirty their own hands.
By the law, a person who committed no crime could not be taken to justice by anyone.
Is this fair?
Is this really fair for such absurdity to go unpunished?
"Next, to throw off the scent of you as the mastermind of the plan, you disguised yourself as a kidnapping victim for your first meeting with the Agency. But the taxi driver never kidnapped you. Now, for consistency's sake, we never questioned this that deeply, but there was no reason for a man whose M.O. involved kidnapping tourists on route to hotels to kidnap an unconscious woman at the train station. It was certainly not for lack of prospective victims. Furthermore, it made no sense that he claimed to not know who you were when he fully admitted to recognizing the other victims. By doing such, you managed to slip through the cracks in our armor and find shelter in the heart of the Agency itself."
Dazai's brow furrowed. "Sasaki," he said, "I'm having a hard time understanding this. A woman of your intellect who has established such a glowing reputation in the world of criminal psychology and perhaps with a connection to the heart of the criminal underworld could very likely have organized a group dedicated to taking out great criminal leaders. Perhaps it would not have been in line with your ideals, but it would have done a great deal towards ridding the world of crime. And yet you chose to do this."
"I... am not an ambitious person," she said. "All I wanted... was to never see sorrow on his face ever again."
Why? This single question continued to run through my mind. Why, why, why? Who was in the wrong here? Who was the person who had forsaken their ideals?
"Sasaki, your crimes end here," Dazai said. "To speak nothing of your invisible crimes, you can't hide the fact that you murdered this young man Rokuzou. We were your targets, not him. You will be arrested and tried for this."
"No, I will not be." She aimed her gun at Dazai. "I have no target. And you will not be able to testify against me. If you attempt to relay to the authorities any of the events which have transpired tonight, the Agency will come under attack once more."
Was this a threat? Calculated up to this point, for this very situation-
"Stop." The word crept out of my throat, dry and hoarse. "Stop. I give in. Do not attack the Agency again."
"Please do not move, Mr. Kunikida," said Miss Sasaki.
"Stop!" I wailed. "Why?! Why, I ask you! We're not the ones you should be aiming your gun at!"
"Then please enlighten me, Mr. Kunikida. Who should I aim at? Who should I feel this resentment for?"
"At-"
There had to be someone. There had to be a source of all this treachery and corruption. There had to be an ideal world in which all were justly rewarded and fairly served. Evil had to be the roadblock on the journey toward achieving such a world. Something, something had to be-
Did she take my hesitation as a lack of reply? Miss Sasaki scowled and lowered her eyes.
"Everything I have done up to this point," she said, "was continue to be a loaded gun as a piece of martyrdom for his – the Azure King's – ideals. There is nothing you can do to stand in my way. Therefore, let us-"
She slowly lowered the gun. "Let us make a deal. You will not interfere with me, and in return, I will not attack the Agency. I will leave this place. And in another area, I will use another organization and cause the same events. Again and then again. I will not let you deter me."
Dazai fixed his piercing gaze on Miss Sasaki and said, "That works."
"I knew you would understand, Mr. Dazai," she said. "You always look one step ahead and choose the best option for all involved, never minding your feelings. Then you also must know there is one more thing that must be done here."
"Yes. However, I am not the one to do it."
"Then-" Miss Sasaki turned to me and gave me a faint smile.
So her plan would only continue from here. So she would continue all her deceptions and all her manipulations as the pile of the dead only rose higher behind her. She would continue to be the speaker for this azure ghost, as the Azure Apostle.
Time has stopped for the dead, and thus my loved one can no longer embrace happiness nor laughter. Oh – I am so tired of it.
She did not have to cause deaths. This was not the ideal way to live. There was, I was sure, most certainly an ideal world.
But who was the roadblock on the journey towards it? No matter how I approached the problem, no matter how her actions resulted in ideals-
"Mr. Kunikida," she whispered. "It may have been a ploy to deceive you, and yet... you came straight to my rescue without any hesitation when you found me in the water tank.... It made me happy. These are our final moments together, Mr. Kunikida, so I want to tell you one thing."

Gun shots.

Three bullets pierced her chest.

Blood welled from the gaping holes in her torso.
Clad in her white kimono, she swayed like a dancing flower petal. And then, like a marionette with its strings cut, she collapsed.
"Sasaki!" I cried. I rushed to her side and cradled her body in my arms. She was so light. She was a doll with no weight to her. The blood from the wounds in her chest stained her torso crimson.
"... Serves... you... right."
I raised my head. The boy, still prone on the floor, clutched a black handgun. "The... Azure... King... killed... my father..." he groaned. His face was ghastly pale from blood loss, and he bore a gruesome grin. The gun in his hand smoked. "He was... my father's... enemy! My father was... a just man...! Serves you right...!"
The gun dropped from his hand. Rokuzou let his face fall into a pool of his own blood, twitched feebly once, and then moved no more.
Miss Sasaki whispered from my arms, "Mr... Kuni... kida..." A dribble of blood silently trickled from her lips. "In... some ways... you remind me... of him." Her reddish-brown pupils caught the light and trembled. "Your ideals... they... cannot be stopped... I... liked... that... about..."

She said no more. She was dead.

"Kunikida," Dazai said, "she was a murderer. There was no other way."
Upon hearing him, all the blood rushed to my head. "Dazai!" I roared. I grabbed and lifted him by the collar.
His expression never changed as he weathered my fury. "Kunikida, there is no such thing of this ideal world as you think of it. You need to give up."
"Shut up, Dazai!" I yelled. "She may have been our enemy, but she was only one woman who barely knew how to use a gun! She never killed anyone! You should have taken the time to make a better plan to prevent this case from taking any more lives, but now look what you've done!"
"I wasn't the one who killed her," he said. "That was Rokuzou."
I pointed to the black handgun lying at Rokuzou's side. "That is your gun! While I was talking, you stealthily kicked it behind you to give it to Rokuzou! Then Rokuzou knew to shoot her!"
From where Dazai had stood, he could have kicked the gun under the bed frame to pass it along without Miss Sasaki being able to see it.
"I didn't kill her," he repeated.
"It's the same as if you had killed her!"
"Sorry, but you can't prove I had any intent to harm her. Rokuzou was the one who picked up the gun and fired it with intent to kill. All I did was kick a gun."
A murderer who would not sully his hands-
Dazai's actions and Miss Sasaki's actions were the same. They killed vicariously, capitalizing on a third party's ill will. Legal channels could not have proven they had any intent to do harm. Neither could they have been indicted.
"Kunikida, this is the kindest thing we could have done for her. It's better this way," said Dazai.
"You're wrong!" I shouted. "This is not the way it ideally should have happened! Something was supposed to have happened; there was supposed to be some kind of true underlying problem! Therefore-"
Perhaps if Miss Sasaki truly resented the world at large –
Perhaps if she truly intended to destroy us –
Yet I recalled the moment in this very hospital during which I charged into the poisonous gas. If Miss Sasaki hadn't stopped me, I would have breathed in the gas and died. If she had meant to kill me, she could have simply let me die. Revenge complete, just like that. It would have looked like an accident. She would have committed no crime.
And why did she save my life?
Was it no more than an instinctual reaction?
I spit the words at Dazai like they were pulled from my throat. "By that very logic, then Miss Sasaki was not responsible for any of these recent events! She didn't even want a world in which all criminals are rightly judged! She only-"
All I wanted... was to never see such pain in his eyes again.
Don't! You mustn't touch that lock!
"Tell me, Dazai! Was it right for her to die? Is this the ideal world I've sought for...?"
Dazai stared at me and whispered, "Kunikida. There are those who believe in your just, ideal world, and thus they grow to resent this one. The Azure King was one such person. While championing his causes of justice and idealism, he hurt the weak around him."
He looked far off into the distance. "The phrase 'seeking justice' is a weapon. Once it hurts the weak, it can no longer be a force of good. This justice the Azure King sought was what killed Sasaki."
His accusation wounded me. Seeking a world of justice and ideals, indeed. All this suffering had come to pass by seeking to manifest ideals.
"Kunikida, as long as you continue to eliminate those who would thwart your ideals in your quest for the ideal world, the flame of the Azure King still burns inside of you. And it will consume those around you. I have seen this happen many times before."
Dazai looked far beyond me to someone I could not see. He spoke to the shadow of one I would never know, one I would never be able to reach, one trapped in the abyss.
"I-" I began. I brushed Dazai's hand off. I understood what he said. Perhaps what I was looking for was not outside the realm of justice but within myself.
But nevertheless, Miss Sasaki and Rokuzou both lay dead.
I felt helpless to only pursue justice in my own self.
I stared out the hospital windows. The crimson spider lilies bobbed in the breeze wafting through the ruined garden below. Even when I closed my eyes, the red lingered on the back of my eyelids along with an imprint of her smile.

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