Tvgirl writing prompts

Remember -Death of a party girl

-explained at bottom-

I realised something was seriously wrong.

and startlingly I then I realised this wasn't the first time I'd realised this in the last 5 minutes. I had forgotten I forgot. But now I knew.

Until I didn't again.

and then all of a sudden I realised it one more time. How many times has this happened? This- I was starting to - get sick.

Oh my god I was sick..
And it was getting worse with every step. Step towards the... uhhh the ?
The neon lights on this street seemed to stretch out into thin lines. into swords. And it hurt. towards me. Straight to the eyes

I tried to say something to someone so they could make it stop but I couldn't stop. I didn't stop mumble. mumbling. I couldn't make the sound loud enough. It was so slow and I was moving so fast that it hurt. What was it actually?

Because I wasn't moving. Weird.

Please.please.please.please. Please what?
I can't actually-

Did I do something wrong? I did something wrong. I had to have because now I'm-

Am I dying?

I feel a pull, a churning at the center of everything. And I am acutely aware of every stimuli, before or until I step out of reality, or maybe I phase out. Maybe i'm whisked away by some benevolent being, but i'm not there anymore I'm here. Where is here?

All I know is i'm being pushed and theres something keeps pushing. and it's pushing me, you, pushing all of it to the side. I want to hold on to something. But there IS nothing. Not here anyways

In that moment, despite what I'd previously theorised I knew I had a soul. I became painfully aware of it sparking. It hurt like a sparkler pressed into skin. My soul contained in this chamber, squashed against the unexpressed youth inside. Churning for dominance. Life and death.

Oh. so I am dying. I should be panicking but all I can do is shake.

If I am anything in this moment I am heartburn. If I am anything in this moment I am nauseous, I am burning and burning. I am the poppie in July, there is no hellfire. I am the everything in this place and I am it all at once.

Teach me how to dull it, teach me how to still my body. I wish I could speak, teach me how to speak in the way that you can hear.

Alone. Trailing out. Oh my god, it hurts.

Until it doesn't anymore.

until it

i am

anymore?

it

——————-——————-——————-——————
EXPLAINED:

she's dying.

(Okay yeah that's not very creative)

it's the most clear thing I associate this song withSomeone overdosing, someone in a bad situation.  Kept this very messy and jumbled since her thoughts would DEFINITELY be disjointed  but I wanted to make it more coherent in the middle as she detaches from her body.

—-thoughts on song—-

One thing from the song I thought was pretty interesting was the lines- "why do I come here? And remember. Remember what?" As she dies her life is flashing before her eyes. But she's dying she can't latch on to anything can't hold a coherent stream of thought. She's remembering for the last time now.  there's also there's references to her drug habit and in the song she does as the title suggests, die. And She references time speeding up and the nights getting longer. So I added in some references to perception changes.

She's clearly a very strong willed woman but she's flickering out now. Or maybe she's burning out in a fire. Whatever she is the life is diminishing. Sure she is "old" by the standards of the speaker but who wants to bet she's just 27+

And unfortunately her life is done.