Triden: A New Era (Trump and Biden)

Thanksgiving (Trump's POV and ft. Hobama)

Today is Thanksgiving, and the only thing to be thankful for is politics, oh, and I guess my husband. We are inviting our only friends, Obama and Harry Styles. Harry Styles was wearing the most goddamn gorge-fab sparkly pink dress matched with sparkly pink heels and a choker with the word "daddy" written on it. I know I am married, but oh my goodness, he was serving, and that ass looked hella thick in that fit. See, old people can talk classy too. I know all the slang words; I'm gay.

Obama brought out this giant turkey. Damn that bird with a thick ass. I got bored of this grateful stuff, so I went to the store and started harassing fans. I mean, thanking my fans. I saw that the new gay fluffy islands movie was out. I thought it was very good in show form, but in movie form, they really outdid it. I got bored looking around, so I found a Spider-Man costume that was for Halloween that no one had bought, so I put it on, and I started jumping on the shelves and swinging. Dang, I still got moves, so I started dancing on the pole on the ceiling. Apparently, everything I do now is illegal, and I got arrested again. I called my husband because he gave me my free phone call. He answers, and he goes, "HELLO, WHAT HAPPENDED TRUMP? WHAT DID YOU DO AGAIN? I feel bad that I am probably ruining this Thanksgiving, so I say, "I'm so sorry for ruining our Thanksgiving. I just wanted to tell you I love you and I am incredibly grateful for you, even though I don't say it." He accepts my apology, and he bails me out. I need to stop getting arrested; it is too much fun.

We go home, and we eat the turkey. It was so peaceful. Maybe I don't need to do crazy things to have fun; maybe I just need a good group of friends. I hope we never die, because I'm not done loving him.