with you // lee jihoon

01

I stood in my room, looking at the mess I have made the other night trying to sleep. Sighing, I cleaned up the area I used on my desk after giving up thinking of the sleepless nights I would always have. I caught a glance of how I looked right now, my pale skin and the disheveled hair sticking out everywhere and the bags under my eyes darker than usual.

"Sookyung-ah have breakfast!" I heard my aunt yell from downstairs for the nth time. I dragged myself downstairs after fixing my hair and sat down in front of Jaehwan, next to my brother. Kyungsoo, my brother, hugged me and asked if I had a good sleep, making me lie and nod 'yes' to him. Jaehwan was the only one that knew I couldn't sleep at night and the reason why. I looked at Jaehwan and said good morning.

"Did you sleep today? No?" He sent a concerned look at my direction. I shook my head 'no' before looking down at the now soggy pancake and picked at it before it was time to go to school. Excusing myself, I went up to my room and got ready for another horrible day at school. Throwing on my uniform I put on concealer to cover my dark circles.

"I'm going in Sookyung." I heard Jaehwan from the other side of the door. He barged in after counting to five, earning himself a glare from me.

"What do you want." I groaned as I sat on my bed. Can he please leave? I don't want to see his face right now. He looked around my room and inspected the mess I have made these past few days to make myself go to sleep. He sighed before sitting on the chair of my desk and stared at me.

"What are you looking at." I glared before standing up and pushing him out the door, slamming the door in his face. I heard him mutter something before walking away and into his own room. Why do I have to live like this? I sighed and looked at my wrist, tracing the scars I left after the accident. I hate you mom. I hate you dad. I hate everyone in this world. I heard a knock on the door, making me irritated.

"WHAT?" I yelled as I whipped my head to the door to see Kyungsoo standing there with a frown on his face. I softened a bit as he waddled over and sat next to me on my bed, leaning his head on my shoulder. I wrapped my arm around my younger brother's shoulders and hugged him tightly.

"Are you okay noona?" I asked as he looked up with his big and round eyes. Smoothing his hair out, I nodded 'yes' and hugged him one more time. I told him to get ready for school and walked out of my room with him. Grabbing my backpack on the way out, I walked down the stairs and waited for Jaehwan who insisted that we walked to school together.

Putting on my coat, I stepped out into the cold November weather and sighed. As I walked to the bus stop, I put on my normal facial expression, not having to hide from Kyungsoo. He was too young to handle my real self.

"Smile Sookyung-ah, you never smile anymore. When you first came after your mom's d- I mean you used to smile a lot and play with me and my friends." He smiled, trying to cover up what he was about to say. Ignoring him, I took out my earbuds and put them in my ears to block him and the rest of the world out. We soon arrived at our school so we got off and slowly walked to the gates, me a couple feet away from Jaehwan and his 5 other friends.

"Hey Sookyung, come join us!" Sanhyuk said as he looked back to where I was. I just stared at him like he just said something stupid, making turn back and join the conversation again. They were walking so slow so I pushed them out of the way and walked to the building alone.

On my way to my classroom, someone ran into me. Not even looking up at the person, I apologized even though it was his fault that I fell over. I turned and started walking but then felt someone grab me by the arm.

"You're bleeding." It was the same person that bumped into me.

"It's fine." I said as I tried to loosen his grip on my arm. He tightened the grip on my arm and yanked it, dragged me down the hall.