Blurred Stitches (Boyxboy)

Chapter One - It's A Dreadful Life

December 1st

I awake with my hands clenched around the sheets and my room looking grim and dreadful. I picked out the black curtains especially for no sunlight, at least they're doing their job. My room is nearly empty as I never seem to find the use to put much in it, though I'm not sure why. I sit up gradually. My bed creaks along with my bones. Through the curtains, the sun shines coldly, giving me a headache.

I'm not sure why the Sun does that to me, because I used to enjoy it, but now it just is a nuisance. I'm about to go downstairs when I finally notice that I fell asleep in my day clothes last night. My grandmother might find that odd. She'll probably be paying special attention to me since today's my birthday. You can never be too careful.

After changing into a t-shirt, plaid jacket, and jeans, I make my way downstairs slowly as my body aches. As soon as my grandmother hears the last thump of the steps, "Happy Birthday Jacob!" She says waving her hands in the air. She'd really gotten a banner, streamers, and a birthday hats just for the morning. All of the components seemed to brighten up the white kitchen.

"Thank you, Grandma," I say walking up to her and putting my arms around her comforting figure. She holds me tight, and honestly, there's no better feeling as I know she loves me. The smell of bacon drifts into my nose, though its not exactly gratifying to my stomach, I'll ignore it for her sake. She pulls back and takes a look at my face, holding my cheeks and smiling a warm smile.

"Oh my baby boy... Already sixteen. My how you've grown so fast!" She coos. "Oh! I've made you breakfast!" She prances over to the stove and fixes a plate for me. I can't help but smile and appreciate it.

"Oh golly, you didn't have to do all of this, but thank you," I walk over and kiss her cheek.

"Oh nonsense! You're sixteen now! You should be having a big blowout party, but don't worry," She pauses "I'll respect your requests of a simple get together." I nod.

After finishing breakfast and trying to keep it down, I head out for school. My backpack is more of a hassle than I last remember. I scratch my arms. They're already scratched up pretty bad from other withdrawals, but maybe tonight Dylan will bring something when we hang out. My shoes clang against the sidewalk and I look up at what the day has grown to be. The blue skies brought chilly December gusts along with them.

I hate walking alone, or being alone in general. My thoughts always get too strung out and dead when I'm by myself. Especially when I'm outside. The sky is so big and the Earth bigger and the universe bigger than that, and here I am, so small and easily crushed to the ground. A birthday means nothing, just another day older and knowledgeable. Just so ... small.

~ ~ ~

At lunchtime, I return outside to a bench beneath a lifeless tree. The tree bends over the bench, as if offering its dying limbs. How kind. Sitting down, I have to zip up my jacket. The breeze nips through it still. I take a deep breath of the fresh air.

"Jakey! What do you think you're doin' hidin' boy?" Roxy runs up to me, as bubbly as ever. Dylan follows behind her with a small smirk. "C'mere birthday boy." She pulls me into a hug that could be mistaken for a death grip. I laugh with her. I realise then that I am in a good mood today. I'm not sure how long its been since I've smiled this often.

"Do I need to sing happy birthday? I think I need to sing happy birthday. Oh-!" before Dylan can even begin his song, Roxy and I both reach to cover his tone deaf mouth. We laugh and retract our hands. "Can't believe you guys don't appreciate me."

"Oh shut it Dylan." I laugh punching his shoulder playfully.

"Anyway, Leo, Dylan, and I put our money together and gotchya a little somethin-somethin," Roxy mentions, poking my sides.