your hand in mine

xiii

"I hate that we need to leave this bed." She used to hate the way Lisa's smile made her feel; the warmth she mistook for discomfort spreading through her chest. Too fast, too confusing. Unwanted.

Now, she happily lets herself melt when Lisa's lips stretch in a shy, small grin that grows under her fingertips tracing beautiful contours. "I strongly… dislike it."

Roseanne only hums and leans up, pressing her mouth to Lisa's in yet another kiss, unhurried, almost lazy. Peaceful , the word springs forth in her mind. How many of those have they shared in the past two hours? Roseanne's both giddy and disappointed to learn she's lost count. She wants to remember each and every one. It's almost as if they just shared their first kiss, and Roseanne can't get enough.

"Roseanne," Lisa mumbles against her lips, and Roseanne's back arches at this because - they are kissing. In her bed. After making love for hours. "We'll be late."

She whines, nuzzling at the soft, warm-smelling skin of Lisa's neck. She wants to see her father, she does. But they have to wait till two and if they skip breakfast then maybe-

"Fine," she mumbles, hands resting on the small of Lisa's back. "But when we come back…" she trails off at the apologetic look in Lisa's eyes. "Or when we… don't come back?"

Lisa sighs, and Roseanne marvels, with certain incredulity, at her body's immediate response. Jesus, she thinks. It's just a sound.

But it's not. It's Lisa, she blinks with awe. ' That's what she's doing to me, and I don't want it to stop.'

She shakes her head, trying to focus on Lisa's words and not on her lips. "Jessica expects me tonight," she says quietly, and Roseanne wants to laugh because she sounds damn near mournful . When leaving her, she realizes, and the feeling in her chest grows, warm and solid.

She knows it's childish, but: "Can't you cancel?"

"I'm afraid not." Lisa huffs. "She was rather insistent when we spoke on the phone."

"Wait, when did you speak to her?"

She marvels at the pink that spills across Lisa's cheeks. "When, uh, when I left to get us water."

"Ah," Roseanne nods as if remembering. "Right after I took three of your fingers, you mean?" The question sounds innocent as she bats her lashes at Lisa, but it's anything but.

Lisa's face flushes further. She clears her throat. "I - yes. Right after that."

"I can't believe you're still able to feel shame after everything you did to me," Roseanne doesn't hold her laughter back as she teases her lover, enjoying her embarrassed smile and downcast eyes. Lisa Manoban, the mighty CEAsh, is too adorable for her own good.

"In my defense," Lisa's expression is stern, but her eyes are sparkling with laughter, and Roseanne - she can't wait to draw her. "You did things far worse."

It hurts, suddenly, deeply, and Roseanne hopes Lisa doesn't see it in her eyes. She did things far worse. She's started off using Lisa for her position, for her money. She intentionally went after her and made her fall in love with her, knowing fully well she would ruin her in the end. And the worst part is, that hasn't changed. Even after unexpectedly falling for her, Roseanne is still going to break her heart, but she can't keep lying to her. Lisa has the right to know the truth.

She only hopes that the truth won't cost her Lisa, but if it does, it's the least of what she deserves.

"Hey," Lisa's whisper ghosts across her lips. "Where did you go?"