If I Go

Chapter 3

Troye P.O.V

After Tyler invited me to his house I walked home as soon as possible. I rushed into my room and fixed my hair. As soon as it was perfectly quiffed, I sprayed cologne on and ran out of the house. "Honey, where are you going?" my mom asked when I was standing in front of the threshold.

"I'm heading to a friends house, and if you keep asking me questions, I will be late."

"No. but seriously where are you going?"

"I already told you, a friends house!" I yelled out out the door. She seemed to be very confused with the idea of me having friends, but I don't blame her for thinking about that since I have a very unsocial life. I texted Tyler and asked for his address and when he texted me I just noticed what he set his contact to on my phone. 

cutie batootie with a rad ass booty: Aye Troye!

Troye-Boy: oh nice contact name Tyler

cutie batootie with a rad ass booty: Ya like it ;)

Troye-Boy: Hahaha sure.... Anyway, I was wondering if you could text me your address?"

After we exchanged information, I started the car and was on my way to his house. After I got there, I took a deep breathe before knocking on the door a couple of times. Its not that I wasn't excited  to hang out with Tyler, because I genuinely was! It was just that the last time I tried make friends, It didn't go so well. I told them my biggest secrete, my sexuality, and it turns out they were all homophobic assholes who completely ruined middle school for me. 

And here I am. My last year in high school and I just started to make friends. When I heard the door creek open I quickly shot back to earth and realized that I had to socialize. He gestured me to come into his home so I stepped onto the hardwood floor of his house. It wasn't a big house, but it was it wasn't small. 

It was perfect for a small family. Unlike my house, it was all one story and only had a couple rooms. Realizing I zoned out again while taking in his home, I realized he was just staring at me with a very unfamiliar stare. It wasn't like anything I've seen before. It was definitely not sadness or anger, but was it fondness? 

No. I shooed the thought of that out of my mind, and made an attempt to say something but found myself just swallowing a large lump in my throat. I couldn't believe I was this nervous around him. After awhile of uncomfortable silence, Tyler cleared his throat and I directed my gaze towards him.

"So um, do you want to hang out in my room or..." he asked

Before he could suggest anything else, I interrupted him, and agreed to the idea. As we walked into his room I stood there very awkwardly. He had a bed in the middle of his room with dark blue sheets, and a matching dark blue couch on the wall. After awhile of examining his room I walked over to the couch, while he sat on the edge of his bed, and sat down. I twiddled with my thumbs before I heard him speak up.

"So tell me about yourself Troye Sivan." He asked. I tried to think of something personal to say, but without revealing to much about myself. I was pretty closed off. I never ever told anyone that I was gay, other than my parents and that group of boys at my old middle school. Luckily I moved far away from them and that school so nobody really knows anymore.

"You know Troye you seem to zone off quite a lot. What are you thinking about?"

I shrugged and looked down.

"Well if you're not going to tell me anything, then I'm just going to have to ask you questions. And no backing out of them."

"O-okay" I stuttered. I was not as scared as my voice made it sound like I was because for some odd reason I trusted him.