Chasing Midnight

8: the things we do for love

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Maui sat on the floor of her dimly lit apartment, the bottles of liquor scattered around her a testament to her despair.

The once vibrant and colorful space now felt like a prison, closing in on her with every passing minute. The sunlight that filtered through the curtains did little to lift the heavy gloom that settled over her.

She picked up a half-empty bottle of whiskey, her hands trembling as she brought it to her lips.

The burn of the alcohol was a temporary escape, a fleeting numbness from the constant ache in her heart. Her thoughts drifted back to Aya, to the moments they shared, the laughter, the love. Tears welled up in her eyes as she remembered the last time she saw her.

The night they broke up

Maui had wanted to reach out, to hold her, to beg her to stay. But something inside her had frozen, and she could only watch as Aya walked away, her figure growing smaller and smaller until she disappeared from view.

She realized that even though she stretches her hands out, she cannot reach Aya because Maui already limits herself to avoid the possible chaos.

She already had her ways— and it broke them both.

The tears that she had held back then now flowed freely, mingling with the alcohol as they spilled onto the floor.

Days turned into a blur of darkness and intoxication. Maui couldn't bring herself to leave the apartment, to face the world without Aya.

She replayed their last moments over and over in her mind, the regret gnawing at her soul. She should have chased after her, should have fought for their love. But now, it was too late.

The pain was relentless, a constant companion that refused to leave. Maui curled up on the floor, clutching the bottle to her chest as if it could somehow fill the void left by Aya's absence.

She closed her eyes, letting the darkness take over, wishing for an escape from the torment of her broken heart.

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MAUREEN

Blangko ang isipan ko habang hawak ang bote ng alak na kanina pa sa mga kamay ko.

Sinubukan kong lisanin ang bawat alaala naming dalawa pero hindi naging madali—at lalong hindi magiging madali.

We caused so much pain to each other. I caused so much pain for her. Yung babaeng pinili ako sa kabila ng lahat ng pasakit sa mundo ay nawala sa piling ko.

Aya planned a future with me habang hindi ko pa nakikita ang sarili ko na kapiling siya sa hinaharap. She's working hard para sa future namin habang ako, I was just a burden on her dreams.

"Ano ganyan ka nalang? Akala mo ba matutuwa si Ayanna sa ginagawa mo sa sarili mo ngayon?" Hindi ko pinansin si Colet at nagpatuloy sa pag inom.

Dalawang linggo pero parang taon na ang lumipas  after I ended things with Aya.

Hindi ako pumasok sa school at nanatili sa condo ko. Wala naman nang saysay kung babalikan ko lahat dahil wala na siya sa piling ko.

Salubong ang kilay at masama ang tingin kong inagaw kay Gwen ang bote ng alak. "Ano ba, huwag niyo akong pakialam!"

"Tama na yan, you're really going to fill your stomach with this shits!?" Mas inis na suway niya at tinabig ang boteng akmang tutunggain ko.

"Fuck off dude! If this is the only way to numb the pain then I fucking will" Matigas na saad ko sakanila.