Well Beyond

22

The first frost of winter always felt like a gentle nudge that time was moving on, even when I wished I could just pause it. I remember walking through the kingdom on that brisk morning, the air crisp and the world coated in a delicate layer of white. The snowflakes, small and quiet, drifted down and seemed to erase the traces of what came before, leaving behind a fresh canvas.

I brushed my hand along the cold railing of a bridge, feeling the chill seep into my bones. Below, the river ran more slowly, its surface now a glistening sheet of ice with a few brave ducks paddling through. The trees, stripped of their leaves, stood like silent sentinels in the quiet landscape, their branches etched starkly against the pale sky.

As I walked, the crunch of my footsteps in the snow was the only sound that cut through the serene silence. It struck me how much had changed since the last snowfall. Each season, each snowfall, seemed to carry a whisper of the past while clearing the way for something new.

The chill in the air didn't just numb the skin; it numbed the old hurts, the memories of a past that felt both distant and near. Time had a way of smoothing the rough edges, and the winter's touch seemed to add a softening layer over the remnants of what I'd left behind. 

It had been nearly eleven months since I fled from Erik, and the weight of the mating bond was starting to take its toll. The pressure to find him gnawed at me, and on some days, the headaches it brought were almost unbearable. Emma had been my rock through those excruciating moments, her presence a comfort when the pain became overwhelming.

Jasper remains oblivious to the mark I left on Erik. The thought of telling him makes my stomach churn, especially after not being completely honest with him. The spark I once felt with Jasper has dimmed, and it's mostly my fault. The idea of being with anyone other than my mate has become repugnant to me. Emma has transitioned into more of a friend than a lover, and I can't deny that the shift in our dynamic has been largely influenced by my own emotional distance.

Emma has also started her job at the Castle, just as Jasper promised. I have a nagging suspicion that something has developed between them—a "situation-ship" of their own, perhaps. I feel a strange sense of detachment about it all, a disconnection that I can't quite shake. My thoughts keep drifting back to Erik, and no matter how much I try to immerse myself in the present, he remains a shadow over everything. 

I glance towards the forest, my frown deepening. Even my wolf feels distant, as if it's slipping away from me. I let out a heavy sigh and turn back towards the Castle, feeling a sense of defeat weighing on me.

As I step inside, the cheerful clamor of laughter and conversation greets me. Emma and Jasper are busy in the kitchen, Emma's laughter ringing out as she bakes. I can't help but smile warmly at the sight, the comfort of their camaraderie a small balm for my weary heart.

"Hey, guys," I call out, drawing their attention. "Is there anything I can help with?"

Emma shakes her head softly, her smile bright. "No, I think we're all set here. Jasper was just pitching something to me."

"Oh yeah?" I ask, raising an eyebrow at Jasper. He meets my gaze with a gentle smile.

"I'm hosting a private dinner tomorrow and could use some help with the baking," Jasper says, his eyes twinkling with a hint of mischief. "Emma's allegedly busy, so I was hoping you might be interested."

I shift uncomfortably on my feet, considering his offer. "Sure, I'd be happy to help. My mind's been all over the place lately, and baking sounds like a nice distraction."

Emma gives me a knowing look. She's aware of the turmoil I'm experiencing with the mating bond—something Jasper, with his belief that it's been fully rejected, remains oblivious to. I've been avoiding Jasper lately, the connection we shared feeling both forbidden and wrong now. The anger I once felt towards Erik has transformed into a deep-seated disappointment. Disappointment with my mate, with my life, with everything.