Estranged • h.s.

15

CECILY

I'm scrambling, trying like hell to rein in my nerves but they're like unmanageable forest fire flames. I've tried to do deep breaths, tried to monitor my blood pressure to somehow keep it down, but I'm actually nervous.

It's Harry, his presence here. This is supposed to be for me and me only, my chance to right a wrong. But when he's here it becomes something else. A beast I cannot tame for the life of me.

I can't focus when he's here. A delusional part of me has used this as a sad explanation for my failure with Derek. That wasn't my fault, it was his for being on the other side of that door. My subconscious hated it, let me falter, and almost cost me everything.

Now, I'm stuck with him again. Only this time, I've driven a wider and much more intense wedge between us. He hasn't dared to speak to me since I spoke rather angrily, to him the other night. The other practices, the gym, the late nights, and even the flight here was radio silence on his end.

Who knows, maybe this extra anger will help me distance myself from him. From his annoying knack for making me second guess things.

"You're on in three, Eris."

I nod, lacking any form of a smile, to the man directing this shit show of an event. It's funny, really, how ironic it is to see Adam York participating in a seemingly positive donation event.

Although it is a lame excuse for people with money to show off, at least they actually appear to really donate the money earned from auctioning off properties and business contracts to a good cause. But alas, that can continue without Adam. His family will move on just fine.

I stand with Ali and Bella and absent-mindedly listen to them go on and on about the extravagant room full of people dripping with wealth. I love the girls, I really do, but who cares? Who cares about fame or money when people die and betray those around them?

I briefly glance at Harry, who stands next to Louis. He's already looking at me but gives nothing away. His face is flat as I continue to look for another second.

I look away, ushered into the main room. The space is fairly clear, most patrons moved to the edges to give us room to get ourselves into position to wrap ourselves into the silk material. Although I'm fully clothed, I feel naked. The skin-tight bodysuit hugs every part of my body, with only my feet and head showing.

"E, remember to be careful with speed and going upside down. This is the first time we've done this with the wig." I roll my eyes at Zayn's comment, smiling through the fact I'm having someone talk to me in my ear.

The glue is secured just fine. I know that.

I ignore him, opting not to look like I'm talking to myself as I run my fingers through the hanging cloth and begin as the music starts.

I try to avoid my curiosity, but once I'm somewhat secure I turn just enough to look at the stage. Louis is in extremely low light, standing alone with a microphone while Harry plays the piano, completely hidden. The crowd slowly moves back toward the middle of the room, which steals me back to the moment.

They're below me, watching in awe. My stomach does a flip of nerves. I could fall, and land on somebody, that would be interesting.

I expertly wrap my feet securely, giving a small push of my wight to confirm that I won't be falling, before I gracefully push my body into the splits, holding on tight to the silk. The crowd's murmurs let me and the other girls know that we're doing something right.

I make a few more moves, the music all blending together with the muscle memory of the synchronized movements. But nothing prepares me for his loud laugh, and my arms shake for a moment. By some hand of God, I don't lose my footing.