A Work of Art

Fence

"Okay, but... what's in it?"

"Dude, I don't get paid to check what's in every package. Do you want it or not?"

Reikas pinched the bridge of his nose. This was the worst part of the job; how was he supposed to know what's in the boxes he delivers? It wasn't a hard concept to grasp, and yet everyone who wasn't expecting a package just expected him to have all the answers. He sighed. Stealing stuff was way more fun than playing makeshift customer support. Less profitable and more morally dubious, sure. But it was fun.

"Look, there's two options. Either you sign for it and take it, or I take it back. I don't care which you do, but just pick one already."

The elderly man at the door, clad in a dirty bathrobe, stared blankly at the box. It was less than 2 feet in any dimensions and seemed to weigh little, based on how the black-haired delivery boy(?) was playing with it. He didn't order it, but maybe someone else did? Although he didn't remember meeting anyone that the package was addressed to. Maybe she'd drop by to pick it up, or-

"Okay, I stopped caring. I'm leaving." Reikas unzipped his backpack, placing the package back inside. Frantically, the man reached down for it.

"W-wait, fine, I'll take it."

There was no attempt made to hide Reikas' groan. He took the package out again and practically shoved it and his phone towards the man. One fingerprint scan later and the phone was snatched back. At least that was the last delivery for the day. With an eye roll and a two finger salute, he hopped back on his bike.

In retrospect, the decision to bike for deliveries during the hottest time of the year wasn't the best idea. The sun blared down on him, his sweat-soaked hair covering his eyes, the lacy white shirt and black short shorts sticking to him in the most uncomfortable ways possible. By the time he got back to his hideout, he was nearly collapsing from exhaustion. Reikas knocked on the door meekly, recoiling at the touch of the metal door in the blazing Pennsylvania sun. A slit in the door opened at eye level.

"Who's there."

"Jesus Christ, Eden. Let me in. I'm gonna die out here. It's like, 100 degrees."

The eyes behind the door rolled as it swung open. Eden stood tall, holding out a semi-frozen plastic water bottle. It was immediately snatched and chugged by Reikas, savoring it as if it were ambrosia, brewed for them and them alone.

"Oh god. Thank you so much," Reikas muttered out between gasps for air. Eden laughed a bit at the sight, pulling him in for a hug.

"Figured you'd be tired. How was work?"

"More of the same. There's a lot of packages to this one chick, but they're all spread out for some reason. So either someone's just trying to fuck with us or she's constantly bouncing between houses and ordering weird super-high-priority shipping stuff." He stripped down to his boxers and collapsed on the couch. His partner let out a low whistle. Reikas smiled. Wasn't the first time, and definitely wouldn't be the last time they'd do that.

"What's her name, anyways?" asked Eden.

"Alexandra... E-something. Ermiss, I think."

Eden's brow furrowed. "You... wouldn't happen to mean Erymes, would you?"

"Yeah, that's it! How'd you know?"

"Rei, she was all over the news last week. Olympic Fencer Forced to Retire After Practice Accident Leaves Her Blind. I'm more surprised you didn't know."

Reikas rolled his eyes, grabbing the last water bottle from the fridge and returning to the couch. "You expect me to watch the news? Who cares? Anything important'll come by word of mouth," he mused between chugs. "Besides, I'm not interested in thinly veiled corporate shills giving me my info. Remember the stuff with Avrim Inc. trying to unionize? The news said-"

A smirk spread across Eden's face. "I'm important. You should make me come by mouth," they interrupted. Reikas nearly spat the liquid out, staring blankly at Eden, transforming instantly into a stuttering mess. A second passed before their smile faded. "...I'm important to you, right?" they whispered.

The stuttering turned into small laughter as Reikas pulled Eden in for a small kiss. "Extremely, Eden."

"Thanks, princess. It's nice getting confirmation... is princess the right word today?"

"Yeah. I'm feeling she/her, today."

"Thought so."

Reikas felt a hand ruffle their hair before roughly pushing them against the couch. Eden stared down at their prey, their hands pinning Reikas' above her. Both were breathing deeply from the heat. A thick air of suspense filled the room, until Eden was the one to break it again. "Hey, uh... you consent, right?"

An eye roll and a giggle accompanied Reikas' answer. "Yes, Eden. I consent."

"Good. Now I-"

The metal door swung open, and in walked a woman carrying a bag of groceries. Her dark skin was covered in sweat, not at all helped by her large, fanciful pink hair and black leather jacket. She walked inside with a smile, her view partially covered by the paper bag. "Hey guys and gals," she called out. "I'm back with the..."

Seraphim stared at the sight before her. Eden and Reikas were naked, faces red and drenched in fluids she could only hope was just water. Eden had the latter pinned down, staring back at her with large eyes like a deer in headlights. Their mouth agape, they struggled to form a single word. Reikas, on the other hand, removed a hand from Eden's grip and gave her a wave.

"Hey Sera! You got some more water bottles, right?"

Seraphim didn't answer. With a look of disinterest, she set the bag down on the floor and sighed. "I don't think... you two clean this couch after, right? We have guests sleep here, you know. They shouldn't have to sleep on the fucking sex couch like we're parta some shitty porno."

Eden, already scrambling to throw on clothes, nodded fervently. "Of course! We aren't that gross. Deep clean it every time..."

"You better." She reached into the bag and pulled out a few cans of soda, tossing one to each of her roommates. "You're acting like we don't see each other naked like, all the time, Eden. If you're trying to show off the fact that you're bigger than him-"

"Her today, actually," Reikas interrupted.

"Her. S'not like it's impressive."

The artist scoffed. "Hey, for the stuff I take sometimes, it's impressive. I'm even above average."

Eden and Seraphim glanced down between Reikas' still-naked legs, examining what was visible from behind the metal cage and pink ribbon. She gave it a small flick and a dismissive "uh huh," much to its owners' disappointment. Suddenly, Seraphim perked up. "Oh yeah, either of you know an... Alexandra Erymes?"

Reikas and Eden glanced at each other as the former sat up. "Yeah, we were just talking about her. Why? You like fencing too?"

"Pffft. Hell nah. Too boring." Seraphim rolled her eyes and held out a small box. "Package came in today for her."

"Should we... open it? It feels a bit wrong to..." Eden began, but was quickly interrupted by Reikas tearing the box open. Inside was a note, written with elegant cursive penmanship. She began to read aloud.

"Your place of residence has been chosen as a possible safehouse. Only other current residents should be notified of this letter, should you not wish calamity on all parties involved. Further instructions will be given should you be chosen.

Thank you for your cooperation.

-Alexandra Erymes"

The heavy silence was broken by a knock at the door.