Prayana

05 | Talks of War

The next four days were simultaneously the longest and shortest days in Abhimanyu's life, so far.

The first night, neither he nor Uttaraa got much sleep.

They were trying to sleep on the same bed as newlyweds ought to, and both of them were curled in opposite directions, trying to catch the attention of Nidradevi.

But neither of them were used to another person sleeping next to them.

Abhimanyu rolled briefly onto his back, staring up at the ceiling.

Sleep was when someone was at their most vulnerable. And for all his warrior training, sleeping next to someone who was, essentially, a stranger was not a skill that could be learned easily. It would take him time to adapt to the presence of another person, to learn her breathing patterns and habit in bed.

So for now... it was just uncomfortable.

He could tell Uttaraa was not asleep yet because of her irregular breathing. It was not the smooth inhale-exhale cycle of one in deep sleep.

"Hey, Uttaraa?" he whispered.

She turned over and met his eyes. "Yeah?"

Abhimanyu was suddenly struck by how much more intimate this moment was—seeing her wide eyes in the moonlight when he'd only ever seen it in sunlight or firelight, the dishevelled state of her hair that only came with tossing and turning in bed, the simple cotton clothes she wore instead of the usual finery—all of these were things he simply would not see normally.

He suddenly felt even more out of his depth, but honoured at the same time.

"Have you ever slept next to anyone?" he asked, keeping his voice low even though there really was no reason for that.

Uttaraa hummed.

"No—not recently, at least," she said, just as quietly as him. "Uttar and I used to sleep in his room until we were about twelve years old, and then Mata said we both were too old for it so she gave me this room. I used to sneak into his bed for almost a year until Mata caught me and set a watch on both of us—and since then I've gotten used to sleeping alone. You?"

Abhimanyu nestled into the pillow and then answered, "I've always been surrounded by a lot of people. I used to sleep with my brothers in Indraprastha, and then at least one of my cousins, Ma, or Mama Krishna in Dvaraka. But I've also slept alone enough. I feel like I'm flexible when it comes to these kind of things."

"That's... good," Uttaraa replied, and then they spent two minutes staring at each other in silence.

And suddenly burst out laughing.

It was hard to laugh while their heads were lying against pillows, but that didn't stop either of them.

"I'll be honest, I never expected this to be my first night after my wedding," Uttaraa confessed, trying to stifle her giggles.

"Same," he giggled back. "Well... I never actually thought about it, for the sake of transparency."

When they were done laughing, Abhimanyu looked back up at the ceiling and then turned to her.

"Thank you for letting me see you like this," he murmured solemnly.

She was confused, but reached out and placed a hand on his, eyes shining in the silvery rays of the moon.

He didn't flinch away from her touch.

"Thank you too," she murmured back.

After that, they both slept well.