Back to you

6 ~ i need time pablo

everything has felt off since I got here. I sometimes even wonder if it had been better if I just stayed in London? But I can't regret my choice to go back to Barca tho cus this is and it will always be my home, even if it doesn't feel like it sometimes.
But everything just feels different, ofcourse I knew nothing would or could be the same since I moved to London but I can't admit that I didn't expect it to be more like everything was before. It's not like it was before at all. It's different. Way different of what I expected it to be and way different of what it was. I guess I just need to get used to this.
Even tho I missed Barca a lot I feel like it wasn't a good idea to give in with that feeling and come back here. I could've stayed in London.
but oh well.

I was walking down the stairs but stopped when I heard people talking the voices sounding very very familiar.

Pablo.

I don't wanna face him right now.
I never want to face him actually.
You could call me dramatic but I don't wanna talk to him at all.
Don't know what it is I just feel betrayed by him while I guess it's not even that big of a deal.
He didn't know I was into him ofcourse so it's not his fault at all.
I just feel like it's better to not see him right now.

But I do need food so I did get downstairs and I did face him.
He just looked at me for a few seconds and walked away. And I just got my food fast and went back to my room.

I was watching a movie when someone knocked on my door
'Yes?' I say and pablo comes is. I wish he would leave me alone, no thats not true i wish i wished he could leave me alone. I want to see him but i dont want to see him. I want to talk to him but i dont want to talk to him.
'Hey' he says i just look at him and nod 'we didn't talk much these days' he says 'i know' i respond back.
'Im sorry, I just wanna know why you dont talk to me' he says 'i need time pablo, could you give me that? Please?'
' no i want you and sienna to meet again' he says
And the bomb fell.
There is no f-ing way im gonna meet her.
Not now. I dont hate her but its all just not the right timing.
" im not gona meet her" i say " yes you are, we have a game in 2 days shes gonna be there and you are gonna be there. Understood?"

no.

" no, im not gonna be there, why do you think you can just think that through for me really quick?"
"Leya i didnt think that through for you, did you forget your brother plays in the same team and your dad is the coach? You dont have a choice"
Fuck.
I hate him.
(I don't)
"Whatever can you go?" I say
"See you in 2 days" pablo says
I just nod and roll my eyes

Yeah its only getting worse now.