"So you're leaving again?" my voice trailed off as I sat up in bed, pulling up the duvet to cover my exposed chest.
"Yeah, I'm leaving." his voice was cold as he pulled his jeans up over his boxers, not looking me in the face as he spoke.
"You never stay for the night, Cole." I blinked back a few tears as I watched him snatch his shirt off the floor and make his way towards the door of the small bedroom of my apartment.
"Cassidy, you know I don't stay." He smirked as he pulled the door open, slipping into the hallway.
"You never told me why it's such a big deal for you to stay the night once you've already slept with me. What is it? Am I not good enough?" my body trembled as the thoughts I've kept to myself for the past three months left my mouth. I tried to stop myself, but the words just kept coming out.
Word vomit.
"I just don't like sticking around." he called out from the hall, and his footsteps soon faded away as I heard the door to the apartment slam shut.
Suddenly I was alone.
Cole and I had a fling going on behind closed doors, and I thought that maybe one day he would decide to pursue a relationship with me.
I thought wrong.
It was two in the morning, and my roommate should be returning from his night out at the bar soon. I wiped my eyes as I slung my legs over the edge of the bed, throwing on a large tee shirt that I had stolen from my friend Kaylee after she had left it here one night.
I don't know why I thought tonight would be different from any other night that Cole and I had pent together, but I suppose a part of me just wanted something different for a change. I got my hopes up, and in an instant they were all torn down.
In the kitchen I grabbed a mug from the cupboard and filled it with water, popping it into the microwave for a minute or two so I didn't have to wait for the kettle to heat up. I pulled a tea-bag out of the little box we kept by the fridge and waited patiently for my water to be ready, and the front door suddenly opened.
"Cass?" my roommates voice was kind of hoarse as he threw he sweatshirt down into the recliner of the small living room.
"Hey, Luke."
"What are you still doing up?" he was in the kitchen now, pulling a chair out at the small table we shared occasionally in the mornings for a quick chat.
"It's a long story." I let out a sigh, causing my hair to blow out of my face as I slumped against the kitchen counter.
"Well, I have time. I don't sleep." He smiled up at me, his blue eyes sparkled in the dim glow of the overhead stove-light.
I bit at my lip, trying to find the words to say. I never really talked to Luke about my problems, hell, I barely talked to Luke at all. But for some odd reason, I didn't feel as if telling Luke what was wrong with me was such a big deal.
"The guy I've been.. sleeping with.." My voice cracked, "kind of, you know, doesn't like staying the night after we've already.. You know..."
"Oh." Luke's eyes widened as he stood up and retrieved another mug from the cupboard above the sink. "Well that's pretty fucked up if I do say so myself."
He took the kettle off of the stove and poured the boiling water into our mugs, throwing a tea-bag into his as he walked back to the table.
"So it's not just me who thinks that?" I hung my head low, crossing my arms in front of my chest. I had a shirt on, but for some reason I felt so bare.
Maybe it was because I was opening up to Luke about what happened to me tonight.
"Of course not." He sipped at his tea, "I mean, when I have sex with some random that I meet, I at least stay the night with her."
I grimaced at his words.
When I have sex with some random I meet.
"What a gentleman-ly thing if you to do, Luke." The hot tea burned my throat as I swallowed, causing me to scowl in pain.
"Careful, it's hot." He chuckled, taking a big gulp from his mug before standing up to put it in the sink.
"No shit."
"Who's the guy you've been sleeping with, anyways?" he scratched at the back of his head, letting a huge yawn escape from his mouth.
I knew he was going to ask this question in the first place, so I didn't know why I was hesitating to respond at the moment. He raised his eyebrow at me while he waited for my response, but as soon as I opened my mouth, the words wouldn't come out.
"Come on Cassidy, I'm not going to say anything to the fucksack." He playfully punched at my shoulder as I avoided his eyes for what seemed like the hundredth time tonight.
"His name is Cole." there they are. The words.
"Cole Liter?" He chuckled for a second, then when he realized I stayed silent, he immediately stopped himself. "So it is Cole Liter. I've heard he was a douche anyways."
"Yeah." The tears threatened to spill from my eyes again as I remembered what had taken place just twenty minutes or so ago. I felt absolutely sick to my stomach, because I had honestly developed some crazy feelings for Cole. But now I know that they'd never be mutual.
"You don't need him, you know." Luke's voice was soft as he walked towards the direction of his room, his footsteps fading away softly.
"But I do need him." My voice was barely above a whisper as I heard Luke's bedroom door close in the hall.
I didn't need to talk to him about my problems, but I did. Luke and I never really spoke unless it was in a rush in the mornings before our classes begun. Mostly we just said hello in passing, we never talked unless we had to. We didn't choose to room together here, but we were forced into it together through rooming arrangements made from the school.
All this apartment did was hold a lot of emotions that never dared leave these white walls.
