TO SHIELD A SERPENT (TNN - SIOBHAN/VIV)

CHAPTER TWO - THE ANSWER

Once Siobhan had finished writing the memos, she rushed out to her car and headed home. She wished so desperately that she could go to the park for a walk, or drive down to the nearby shopping centre and wander around. Once upon a time she could do what she wanted and she'd always loved her little impromptu moments. Now, she was either at work or with Roger, mostly at home. As she parked her car in the driveway, she was pleased to see that it was two forty seven, meaning that she was back early and hopefully, not in any trouble.

As soon as she was inside she made her way to Roger's office and peaked her head around her door "I'm back now." He looked up at her and smiled, clearly his mood had shifted since that morning. Siobhan felt her heart settle slightly as she hoped that their evening together would be a pleasant one. Sometimes Roger was nice to her, he was never loving or gentle with her, but he wasn't always aggressive either. His constant mood swings had her caught in a vicious cycle, swaying between believing that things would be alright one day and wishing she could fall asleep and never wake up. When others looked at Siobhan, they saw Roger's accomplice and the woman who stood beside him in his ivory tower. Nobody saw the reality of him towering over her, controlling and manipulating her, damaging her body and murdering her soul.

Sometimes, Siobhan wondered how people would feel if one day, he killed her. Would they cry for her and wish they'd seen the signs? She'd imagine her gravestone, her name written on a polished slab. In her mind her resting place was always in the shade and there were never any flowers. Forever alone, just as she had been in life, a broken heart long since forgotten by the world that had failed her. When those thoughts overwhelmed her she'd go to sleep and so very often, she'd dream that she had wings. She'd fly to a place where she felt safe and loved, but then she'd wake and realise that her reality was very different.

Siobhan decided to watch Desperate Housewives again as she waited for Roger to finish his work. Because she'd seen the show a million times, she always knew what was going to happen and it made her feel comforted and safe. Around six o'clock, she heard Roger's footsteps approaching the lounge, so she turned the television off just as he entered the room. Anything she liked seemed to irritate him and Siobhan suspected he didn't like being reminded that she was her own person with thoughts, feelings and desires.

Once they'd had dinner Siobhan started to clear away the dishes. As she opened a high cupboard, a crystal whiskey glass came tumbling out and smashed on the floor. She didn't drink whiskey, so it had obviously been Roger who had placed the glass too close to the edge of the shelf. He stormed into the kitchen immediately and hissed "what the hell was that?" As Siobhan turned to face him he continued "you are useless, do you know that?" Siobhan frowned slightly before replying "Roger I'm sorry, it was an accident. It's just a glass." Roger narrowed his eyes and immediately, Siobhan's heart sank.

Later that night, once Roger had fallen asleep, Siobhan finally allowed her tears to fall. She was in so much pain and as she turned away from the man who'd caused it, she buried her head into her pillow. Tomorrow, she knew he'd apologise and buy her a gift. She'd accept it and tell him that she was sorry for not being good enough and that she hadn't meant to make him angry. Memories took over her mind of every time he'd hurt, humiliated or violated her. As she stifled her sobs as best as she could, she heard Vivs voice.

"Are you happy Siobhan?"

She took a deep breath before ever so quietly saying out loud to no one "No. I'm dying."