TO SHIELD A SERPENT (TNN - SIOBHAN/VIV)

CHAPTER SEVENTEEN - ADORE ME

A/N - This chapter does touch on physical intimacy, nothing graphic, just wanted everyone to be aware before reading. There are some mentions of her relationship with Roger.

As Siobhan looked down at the card, she took a deep breath. Looking back up at the bouquet of flowers she felt a flash of anger. Twelve red roses tied together with a cream satin bow, the exact same bunch of flowers Roger had bought for her every time he'd hurt her. Every time he'd taken things too far, a couple of days later Siobhan would find a bunch of roses waiting for her on the dining table. This time, Roger had made a slight deviation - he'd included a card.

That morning, Siobhan had gone to leave the house and nearly tripped over the bouquet that had been left on the doorstep. She knew immediately that this was simply Roger's way of letting them know that he knew where Viv lived, nothing more. As Viv came up behind her and asked "what's going on?" Siobhan simply handed her the card.

Siobhan, darling, please know that I'm eternally regretful for the way that I treated you. You're the greatest loss of my life and I hope that one day, you can find it within your heart to forgive me.

- R

Immediately, Viv felt nauseous as she observed Siobhan's body language. Over the past few weeks, their relationship had progressed and Siobhan had come on leaps and bounds. She was proud of herself, finally Roger wasn't the last person who'd touched her intimately. For the first time in her life, she felt curious about her own body and excited to explore. Viv made her feel completely worshipped and adored, like every single part of her body was precious. She still had bad days but now she knew that no matter what she wasn't alone.

Siobhan's heart was pounding as she tried to calm her nerves, she'd really believed that Roger would leave her alone. She felt Vivs hands on her waist and immediately, she fell against the taller woman seeking comfort. "Please don't worry baby, it's just more pathetic manipulation. I won't let him hurt you, I promise." As always, Vivs voice was so soothing and calm and as Siobhan took in one huge breath, she felt her heartbeat begin to slow down. She looked up at the older woman and smiled "I was just going out to get us some coffee. The flowers distracted me, I'm sorry, I wanted you to come downstairs and find me with your favourite drink, not this ugly bouquet." Viv laughed in response "please don't worry about that gorgeous. Once I've dropped Jamie off at nursery, I'll get something on the way back, it's our day off together and I'm not letting that pathetic excuse for a man ruin the mood."

Within the hour, Viv had done just that and as soon as she was back and settled on the sofa, Siobhan cuddled up against her, wrapping them both in a blanket. They watched television for a while and as usual, Viv traced her fingernails lightly across Siobhan's lower back - it was a feeling that the blond enjoyed. It still took Siobhan a while to pluck up the courage to initiate intimacy and Viv refused to push her in any way. They'd been cuddled together for over two hours before Siobhan pushed herself up and onto Vivs lap, straddling her legs. She felt Vivs hands on her hips, not groping her, just holding onto her safely.

For a moment they looked into each other's eyes and said nothing before Viv started to manoeuvre Siobhan's body down onto the sofa. Being underneath Viv never worried Siobhan, it was completely different than having Roger holding her down and using his body weight against her. As Viv ran her hands lightly over Siobhan's stomach, she whispered into the blonds ear "I will never, ever hurt you. You're safe with me." With that, Viv sat up slightly and began to gently run her hands over Siobhan's body. The blond simply watched, fascinated by the look in Vivs eyes as they followed her hands. When Roger used to touch her, sometimes he didn't even look at her at all. Siobhan had always preferred that to the alternative because when he did look at her, she could tell that he was dreaming of all the ways he could harm her. She'd never been anything more than a possession to him and she'd never felt more aware of that than when he was groping at her body.

Viv looked at her like she was a sculpture, created to show the world the true beauty of a woman's body. The way Viv looked at her had made Siobhan fall in love with her own body and caused her to realise that there was nothing wrong with her. She'd always assumed that she just didn't like sex but truthfully nobody had ever touched her like her pleasure mattered. Viv made Siobhan feel safe before she did anything else, making sure the blonds mind was always in the right place.

When Siobhan felt Vivs hands on her thighs, she closed her eyes for a moment. On several occasions Roger had grabbed her so hard he'd left bruises in the shape of his handprints on her thighs. He'd made her feel like a rag-doll and every time, Siobhan had felt her dignity dying and her heart sinking. She recalled one particular night, when he'd been holding her too tightly and for once she'd looked directly into his eyes. She'd tearfully whispered a very simple question as he'd glared back at her.

"Why can't you just love me?"

His grip on her body had loosened immediately and he'd frowned before snapping "what?" At this point, tears had started to fall from her eyes and she'd started sobbing. In between sobs, she'd managed to stutter "I just want you to love me. Please stop hurting me. Please just love me." Siobhan had been vulnerable in front of Roger many times before but not like this. For just a second, he'd felt a sharp, sudden pain deep within his heart. He'd let go of her and stood up before leaving the room, looking back for just a moment. Siobhan remembered the look on his face as he did so - for several seconds, she'd been so sure that he was going to come back. She'd genuinely believed that he wanted to hold her. Maybe he did want to but he didn't bother, he'd walked away and left her and her heart there to die.

"I just want you to love me."

Siobhan was torn from her thoughts by the feeling of Vivs hands on her waist and her lips kissing slowly down her neck. She was murmuring something over and over again between kisses and as Siobhan listened, she finally understood. She hadn't realised that she'd spoken out-loud, but Viv had heard her.

"I do love you baby."