Sage | H. GRANGER

forty five

Sage had a total of nine minutes of peace. From the moment she broke through the surface of the water to the moment the idea of apparating to Hogsmeade was brought up. Nine minutes where she didn't feel as though her bones were made of glass and the mark that darkened her arm didn't haunt her. Nine minutes where the world spun just for her.

"Sage?" Harry's voice echoed. It cut through the sounds of nature that surrounded them. She looked up at him, pulling herself together. She pushed back wet hair and sighed heavily.

"It's stupid." She paused as a cold chill ran down her spine. "A death wish."

The idea of being that close to Hogwarts again made her stomach churn. The trio stared at her. The plan was already set in motion in Harry's mind. Sage was sure of it. But, the way that he waited for her cue, her nod of approval, made Sage feel as though they gave a damn about what she wanted to do. She had spent years convinced that her words had no weight behind them. That she wasn't a part of this story, their journey, but the way Ron studied her expression as he waited for her opinion and the look of consideration Hermione wore gracefully as Sage spoke sparked a sense of belonging. A flicker of a flame in a sea of doubt. Sage frowned at the thought. Better late than never.

"But, I don't see any other option." Sage finished her thought. Harry nodded in agreement.

"We will go at night, then." With those words left hanging in the air, the four of them readied themselves for what was to come.

Sage sat still close to where the water kissed the shoreline. Her arms wrapped around her knees as she studied the scene before her. Serenity settled across the water like a fog. It reminded Sage of the afternoons she would spend at the Black Lake. When most of her troubles consisted of whether or not the girl she liked felt the same. But, now, it was a different kind of peace. Acceptance, maybe? Sage knew the moment that the four of them stepped foot in Hogsmeade, the end would be near.

"What are you thinking about?" Hermione asked as she sat next to Sage. Sage looked up at her with squinted eyes and a soft smile. She looked back to the water and let out a deep breath.

"Nothing really." Sage mused, drawing her legs closer to herself. She could feel Hermione studying her. On any other given day, Sage would have met her gaze. She would have smiled her smile and kissed the flush that painted the apples of her freckled cheeks. Back then, Sage would have found her peace within Hermione. The serenity that she had longed for, yearned for. But, that was then and this is now. Now, Sage chose to ignore the stare that burnt into her and watched the water ripple.

Hermione sighed and looked back to the water that captured Sage's attention.

"I feel like I'm losing you." Hermione whispered as she mimicked Sage's position. She couldn't stop the words that tumbled out of her mouth. Sage felt her breath get caught in her throat. "I feel like I'm losing you, Sage, and there isn't a damn thing I can do to stop it."

Back then, Sage would have comforted Hermione. She would have said that she wasn't going anywhere and they would make it to the end of the line. But, now, Sage sat silently and watched as the water danced with itself. Hermione waited for some kind of reassurance. For a contrite look or for her to grab her hand and tell her that she was all kinds of wrong. But, all Hermione got in return was silence and that silence said more than anything Sage could've.

The sun was sinking behind the horizon. Its warmth was fleeting, caressing Sage's skin like a forlorn lover. A memory she so desperately wished she could hold onto. The waves kissed the shoreline as the group waited till the sweet sunlight disappeared. The farewell was bittersweet. The warmth that kissed Sage's cheeks vanished and was replaced with the delicate dance of moonlight. Hermione had moved a bit farther from the group the moment she realized that Sage wasn't in a speaking kind of mood. It's for the better. Sage thought to herself when she glanced at Hermione's figure that huddled near Ron.