Remainers

A Fractured Mind, Part 5

Eric watched the campfire crackle as the embers rose into the starry night sky. It was the first time he had actually looked at the sky ever since he found himself in this strange future. He never realized just how many stars were visible when it was pitch black like this, especially when all he could remember was how dark and cloudy the sky was back then.

Eric turned his attention to Hope, who was sitting to his left. The damage on her arm had long healed, and you couldn't even tell that she had been hurt in the first place. Of course, that wasn't exactly what Eric was focused on.

"Cyborgs, huh?" Eric sighed. "I guess I shouldn't be surprised. It was common tech back in the day, after all."

"I told you it would have been fine to explain it up front," Hope said indignantly. "I've had to tiptoe around this guy the whole time because of this."

"I wanted to be careful," Caleb replied. "Say the wrong thing, and it might have given him a bad shock."

"Well, I can't deny I was pretty surprised," Eric remarked. "I didn't realize just how good cyborg technology had gotten. To think humans could survive in a completely cyberized body... and you, Caleb. You're the only person around that's fully human?"

"That's what it seems like," Caleb replied. "They found me in a leftover cryogenic pod chamber almost ten years ago now."

"That must be what happened to me," Eric remarked. "If only I could remember..."

"You still don't remember?" Hope replied somewhat impatiently. She was cut off by Caleb, who silenced her with a wave. Eric eyed the both of them quizzically. Why were they so interested in him recovering his memory?

In any case, that didn't change matters much, except that it only made this reality even clearer in his mind. To be honest, he was starting to lose hope that everything they'd told him wasn't real. He thought about his current journey to find his hometown. Was there still a point in that? By now, he had realized that all he would find there was an empty wasteland.

Eric excused himself for a while and went for a walk. The woods around the mountain were fairly light, and the area was bathed in the light of the full moon, so there was no worry of him getting lost. As he strolled through the trees and breathed in the night air, Eric wondered about whether he should continue his journey. He felt aimless, as if he couldn't find a way to move forward throughout life.

Eventually, he reached the edge of the forest and sat down on a nearby boulder. Left alone like this, he realized that he began to feel a deep loneliness that penetrated straight into his soul. He'd known he was alone for a very long time now, but only now did it genuinely start to sink in.

It was strange. He felt a desire to cry, yet no tears fell from his eyes. Was it so shocking that he couldn't even cope properly? He had no idea, and to be honest, he didn't really want to find out. His life had taken an incredibly strange turn, and he had no idea where to go or how to feel.

He didn't know how long he was out there, but eventually he decided to head back to the camp. It was fairly easy enough; the light of the flames shined through the trees, allowing him to find his way back quickly enough. Caleb acknowledged him with a nod as he emerged from the trees and sat down in front of the campfire.

"How you doing? You clear your head?"

"Kind of," Eric sighed. "I guess I really underestimated how different this world is."

"I get it," Caleb remarked. "Everything feels so unreal that you think it's all a dream. It'd be much easier if it turned out that way, right?"

Eric chuckled wryly. "How did you get used to this, Caleb? I can't imagine living in this world knowing everyone I knew is gone."

"I guess I have a bit of an advantage when it comes to that," Caleb admitted. "The truth is, I'm sort of like you. I don't remember anything before waking up in this world."

"Really?"

"They said it was probably a side effect of being in cryostasis for so long," Caleb explained. "I don't worry about it too much, though. Like you said, I probably wouldn't be able to function if I did."

"So I've just gotta get used to it, huh?" Eric sighed. "Come to think of it, does that mean I'll never be able to recover these gaps in my memory?"

"What do you mean?"

"Well, I should've also been put in cryostasis, right? That's the only explanation for why I've managed to survive so far into the future like this. It'd make sense for me to experience the same side effects as you."

"Oh." Caleb was lost in thought for a moment. "I guess that might've happened. We don't know for sure, though."

"Damn, I sure have the worst luck," Eric said with yet another forlorn sigh. "If it was going to be like this, I'd rather have lost all my memories like you."

"Don't say that," Caleb said with a small chuckle. "They might bring you pain, but someday you'll be happy to have remembered them."

"Right. Sorry," Eric said sheepishly. "After all, not remembering your own family must bother you."

"Somewhat," Caleb admitted. "Though there are other things I wouldn't want to forget either."

After a short talk, Eric decided to go to bed for the night. As he slept, he found himself dreaming of the past again. He didn't know if it was because of the conversation he'd had or if it was a subconscious yearning for what was long gone, but either way he found it surprisingly welcome.

Not that they were good memories. The world was in a bad state even back then, and he could never remember a time where there wasn't some kind of crisis or conflict going on somewhere in the world. Even as a child, he remembered always having to wear a mask to avoid getting sick from the air, or scrambling to find non-perishable food once the threat of war was on the horizon. He'd had to leave home early in his childhood, and he spent most of his life in a shelter built under a church, struggling to survive as the world approached ruin.

Still, he felt a sense of warm nostalgia even when these bitter memories flashed through his mind, as it reminded him of people he could no longer see. His mother, who always kept him well fed even if she had to go hungry. His brother, who entered an abandoned supermarket to find food for everyone and died when the bombs hit. The friends he had made during the short time they went to school, who had all promised to meet up again once they became adults and never did.

The world was already on its last legs then, but even still everyone felt the desire to live. Nobody gave up, even though the idea certainly crept into their minds once or twice. They believed that no matter what the crisis, humanity and the Earth could make it through. That's why he decided to...

What?

What did he decide to do?

Why couldn't he remember?