Defender's Heartbeat

Chapter 21

Manuel

Gerardo hit Enzo once again because of Juana. At 12 years old, Enzo still faced punishment most days. Gerardo dragged him to the library and beat him with a belt. This time, Gerardo wanted me to stand there and watch as he subjected Enzo to a brutal beating.

"This is how you discipline a bad boy, Manuel. "Seeing this will be useful for you, too, since you also have kids," he said, smirking and looking into my eyes.

I said nothing, knowing the consequences if I were to speak. If I tried to protect Enzo from getting punished, there was a chance Gerardo would make the punishment worse just to hurt me. I also understood why he wanted me there. He tried to torment me by punishing Enzo. My blood was boiling inside with anger, yet I couldn't do anything. I felt like I was shaking. All I could do was clench my fists tightly.

Despite Enzo's frequent misbehavior, he hadn't done anything serious this time. He was just having a typical sibling argument, yet he received punishment for it.

"Are you mad at me, Manuel? Because I hit him. Looks like you are too close to him," Gerardo said, observing me. He seemed to be deriving some kind of cruel enjoyment from this, but I didn't see anything like that in his eyes. His eyes brimmed with pure hatred. He hated me so much because I was so close to Enzo.

"No," I replied, staring at him. What else could I say to him? 'Yes, I'm mad at you, Gerardo. I wish I could shoot you?' If I said that, he might shoot me and my family. My little Enzo would be all alone in this world. I needed to be patient and control my anger to protect my Enzo. If it weren't for Enzo, I wouldn't care who the fuck Gerardo was.

I couldn't believe it. I'm not a person with this much patience, especially after what had happened in the army. But I behaved like a different person because of Enzo.

"Good! Because my son is not your business. I do whatever I deem necessary to teach my kids manners and discipline. He's my son, not yours," he stated, looking directly into my eyes.

'He's not yours, Gerardo. He's mine. Only mine,' I thought with anger. Good thing he can't read my mind.

"You have your children, don't you?" He turned away without waiting for my response. He knew I had a son. He was reminding me that he knew everything about me as a warning. Honestly, I did not love my own as much as I loved Enzo. I know it's wrong. That's why I never made Miguel feel unloved or unwanted. I did everything I could for him. I didn't want him to get punished for something he never did. I'm not a bad father like Gerardo. I know the right thing to do, although I don't feel it.

"Take him away," Gerardo said after he finished punishing Enzo.

The entire time, Enzo was screaming and begging, "Please, Papa, don't hurt me. Don't hit me, Papa." But Gerardo didn't give a fuck. I saw how angrily he glared at Enzo as if staring down an enemy.

Every time the sound of the belt hit Enzo's body, I gasped with pain, and I just stood there like a puppet without being able to do anything. Enzo curled into a corner to stop getting hit, but it didn't work. I wished I could drag the belt from Gerardo and beat him to let him taste his own medicine.

Because Gerardo was staring at me, I calmly approached Enzo, who was shivering and sobbing and helped him get up. He hugged my body.

"Don't hug him. Just walk like a man by yourself, Enzo. And stop crying before I hit you again until you stop your fucking crying," Gerardo yelled. And the helpless child was startled, released me, and walked away from his office with me, looking down and shaking.

I followed Enzo to his room. After we entered, I closed the door. There was no need to close the door, as no one would come there, but I did it anyway. Enzo didn't look up. He just sat on his bed and removed his T-shirt. He knew it was time to apply the medicine now. I sat on the floor in front of him, took his little hands, and kissed them.

"I'm sorry, baby," I said, looking into his dark eyes—the most beautiful eyes I had ever seen. He gave me that soul-sucking look. He said nothing but held my hand tightly. I wanted to hug him but didn't want to hurt his wounded body.

"I'll apply the medicine," I said. Enzo didn't respond. I hated that Enzo saw me as a weak father. I hoped that one day he would understand that his Papa was not weak; he was trying to protect him.

I applied the medicine to his wounds, and sometimes he made little sounds of pain. It killed me to see him in pain, and more than that, it destroyed me that I couldn't do anything about it. I was willing to take all the beatings for him, but if I said that to Gerardo, he would get even angrier. It might feel like a punch in the face to him. That wasn't the problem, though. I couldn't guess what he might do next. I couldn't take that risk.

After I applied the medicine to Enzo's wounds, I sat on the couch. Enzo put his head on my lap, lying on the sofa as usual. I stroked his hair smoothly until he fell asleep.