Lonely

Chapter4

GIDEON'S POV

When Mia got home she immediately got dressed in her night wear and that's when I just realized that Today is Friday. On Fridays she does this thing where she puts on really loud music, drink alcohol and dance around but she sometimes smokes this thing that smells really bad

And as I said she puts on the music and lights a cigarette before dancing. She seems to enjoy it, maybe it's making her happy because she laughs a lot and sings along to the song. I don't really know what's going on with her but all I know is that she has been consuming a lot of alcohol than usual. I have seen her do this and she smokes, I sometimes wish that I could get in her mind and see what's making her do this

She picks up the bottle of vodka and takes a big gulp of it. She continues to dance for a while before walking to her bathroom. I could easily see what she is doing. She takes out pills and goes to the kitchen for a glass of water. She looks at the pill before putting them in her mouth and taking a sip of water. This part is always the most painful and the hardest to watch. She looks at her reflection through the glass and laughs she laughs historically before crying. She throws the glass and it hits the wall causing it to shatter. She continued to cry as I watched, I have never felt so helpless. Watching her like this made me hate myself for not just going up to her and hold her

Seeing her like this was like I just drank poison. Slowly entering my bloodstream and slowly killing me...but that's the thing I'm not human, I have no life, no heart, I'm basically a walking body with no soul. So how was I able to fall so hard for a human orphan. I do wish that I could go back into being a human, having a normal life, eating real food, playing in the sun but I know that it will never happen and I have come to expect that

What I do not understand is that even though I do love her very much, I still have this urge to drain her, I crave her blood the most, that's why I found it so hard to be so close to her. I fear that I might one day hurt her and I know that I wouldn't be able to live with myself. Like my little sister who died of old age, she died when she was 117 years, even though she left me without hesitation I still protected her but she didn't know, similarly to Mia I protect her without her noticing

She stands up and picks up the pieces of shattered glass and throws them in a trash can and got a broom to sweep the rest. She walks back to the bathroom and looks at her reflection, she touches her face and looks at the sink before closing her eyes. She's falling head first in depression for something that isn't even there

She walks towards her bed and gets in and covers her body with the sheets. I wait a while just to make sure she's asleep. I walke around the house as I always do, I look at the poetry book that I lend her. She carefully placed it on her coffee table. I open the first page which only had the authors name and under it is where I had written my number in hopes that she might call me

I walk back to her room and stare at beautiful face. I'm sad that what I'm doing won't do anything in the future, what if she doesn't like me, or maybe she doesn't see me the way I see her. My story is a sad one that I hope that only she can change it

I stayed there in her room all night. She would toss and turn and wake up to use the bathroom but come back right after. She woke up very early which I didn't find necessary because it's the weekend. She got out of bed, walked to the bathroom and brushed her teeth and changed from her night wear to some casual, comfortable clothes. She went to the kitchen and made a omelet for breakfast. Mia walks to her coffee table and picked up the poetry book, she opens to the first page and sees my number. That's when the hope I had lost comes back as she actually dialed my number. My phone began ringing, I quickly answer before she changes her mind

"Hello" I say it like it's a question just to act surprised

"Hello, this is Mia...we are in the same class" I smile at how nervous her voice sounds. I like how sweet she can be even if she doesn't really want...it's just who she is

"Mia, I wasn't starting to think that you weren't really going to call me" I spoke honestly

"I honestly don't know why I called" she chuckles slightly, music to my ears

"You needed someone to talke to" I'm basically telling her that she needed someone to talk to...and I'm that someone

"Would you like to go on a nice walke with me?. If you're not busy of course" I can't believe what I'm hearing, she wants to go on a walk with me. I slowly smile

"Yes...yes I would love to" I respond excitedly "would you like I pick you up?" I ask

"Yes, I will send you my address...I will be ready in 10 minutes" and she hands up. I quickly got back home to shower and get some clean cloths on. I'm so excited, I mean I know that this isn't a date but I will just keep fantasizing until it comes true and let's hope that it will