KALEIDOSCOPE ━ WADE WILSON

CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

PLAYLIST;
i. called you again - lizzy mcalpine
ii. garden song - phoebe bridgers
iii. cleopatra -  the lumineers
iv. halley's comet - billie eilish
v. nobody else - lany
vi. somebody else - the 1975

—

Ainoa leaned against the cold metal railing of the balcony, her cigarette burning low between her fingers. The midnight sky was clouded, masking the stars, leaving only the dim orange glow of the street lights. She inhaled deeply, letting the smoke fill her lungs before slowly exhaling, watching it curl and twist into the darkness.

Her duffel bag was packed and waiting by the door. Just a few more things for Lucia to gather and they'd be out. But standing here alone, Ainoa couldn't shake the gnawing ache she wished would fade with distance. She hated how much Wade got under her skin. Even now, after everything, she wasn't sure if leaving was truly what she wanted. It just felt like the only way to break free from the confusion, the push and pull between them.

The sound of the front door opening behind her pulled Ainoa from her thoughts. She didn't need to turn around to know who it was. His presence was unmistakable—the quiet intensity that Wade rarely let show around anyone else.

"Careful, you might get addicted to those," Wade's voice cut through the silence. His tone was playful, but softer than usual, almost hesitant.

Ainoa didn't respond immediately. She took another drag of her cigarette and flicked the ash over the railing. "I'm already addicted," she muttered, her voice laced with bitterness.

Wade leaned against the railing beside her, keeping some distance. He tilted his head back, staring up at the sky. "So, you're really going through with this? Packing up and leaving like it's the last episode of a bad sitcom?"

Ainoa's eyes narrowed as she glanced sideways at him. "You think this is some kind of joke? You have no idea what's going on in my head right now, Wade."

"I know it's not a joke," Wade said quietly, his humor evaporating. "I just don't want this to end like this. Not after everything."

Ainoa let out a humorless laugh, turning fully to face him. "After everything? You mean after you treated me like I was just some pawn in your stupid jealousy game? Or after you decided to get cozy with Vanessa behind my back?" Her voice shook with anger, her chest tightening with all the unspoken hurt she had tried to bury.

Wade flinched at her words, the mention of Vanessa cutting deep. He could see the pain in Ainoa's eyes, and for once, he didn't have a quick retort or joke to hide behind. "I know I screwed up, okay? I know I messed everything up because I'm a walking disaster who pushes people away the moment they get too close. But this—" he gestured between them— "this is different. You're different, Ainoa."

Ainoa's grip tightened on the railing, her knuckles turning white. She wanted to believe him, to let his words soothe the ache in her chest, but the hurt was still too raw.

"Different how, Wade?" she challenged, her voice barely above a whisper. "Different enough that you won't run back to Vanessa the moment things get tough? Different enough that you won't lash out at Santiago or anyone else you perceive as a threat?"

Wade ran a hand over his scarred face, frustration and regret etched into every line. "I know I fucked up. With Vanessa, with Santiago... with you. But Ainoa, you have to understand, I've never felt this way about anyone before. It scares the shit out of me."

Ainoa's anger faltered slightly at the vulnerability in his voice. She'd never heard Wade admit to being scared of anything before.

"Scared?" Her voice was tinged with disbelief. "Wade, you charge headfirst into gunfire without blinking. You crack jokes while staring death in the face. But this?" She gestured between them, the space charged with unspoken tension. "This is what you're afraid of?"