BLIZZARD (JON SNOW X OC)

Chapter Four (Alana)

CHAPTER FOUR

Alana

One Year Later

Her 18th Name-Day

This is the first time I'm celebrating my name-day without my parents. Every year my mother would buy me a new gown with all the accessories to match. Necklace, earrings, hair piece, bracelet, ring, and even a piece to wear on my ankle.

This year I got nothing but a letter telling me not to bed my betrothed even if he says it's a birthday gift. I crumble the letter and throw it into the fireplace of the great hall after reading it. The seal had already been broken, meaning Lord Stark had read it before handing it over to me. I could see the look of horror in his eyes when I looked away from the fireplace and tears streamed down my face.

"Princess.. When I was in the Vale being fostered by Lord Arryn, I was younger than you. I remember clearly how painful it had been with mine own parents who did not even write for my name-day, let alone send a gift or anything of the sorts, simply left me there to rot for all they cared. At least that was how I had felt. But I do remember that Lord Arryn would let me pick on dessert to have after a dinner of my choice. My favorite? Venison with a berry compote and roasted carrots that would make your mouth water at the smell of it. Gods, I wish I could have some now. And for my dessert I'd always pick a blueberry crumb cake." Lord Eddard explained.

"You at least had my father there with you. You were not so shut out and alone. Treated as a stranger in a place that was never truly home to you." I replied. "Your castle is beautiful and the sights captivate me, My Lord, but it is not my home. Your wife is not my mother and you are not my father. Your sons are not my brothers and your daughters not my sisters. I have missed my baby sisters first name-day. I heard from Gendry that my mother had a ball in her honor. Father hired actors from Essos to perform plays to make her giggle. Mother garbed her in all rubies and yellow diamonds. She was even crowned a tiara with antlers to match my father's crown."

Something that I have never received in my entire life. Only once did I get a necklace with a stag on it but never a tiara. My aunt Selyse makes gowns for a hobby of hers. She started to do it when my little cousin Shireen had been touched by the stone curse and had her face tainted. She'd sit by her crib and one day began to make clothing. She once made me a gown of crimson for my mother's house colors but with black and gold, embroidered crowned stags along the skirt. It was the most beautiful gown I had ever seen in my life.

When my father saw it he called it hideous and said Selyse had lacked taste. My mother tossed it to the flames when Selyse had not been looking. I only wore the gown once when I had tried it on to show my parents. My mother said since I am not heir and Gendry is, that he should be the only one to wear a crowned stag or any sort of stag that resembles my father's.

Finding out that she placed a tiara that matches my father's crown onto the head of my baby sister Barra simply made my skin crawl. I love my baby sister more than life itself but the pain of knowing that it will never be me and that I will never be enough for my parents aches my soul. I wondered if Myrcella had begun to feel the same way too. If she also had become the forgotten daughter like I had been.

Shipped away to the north to be houses by the Starks knowing that this is as far away as they could place me. For the year I'd been here I started to think that perhaps if my mother had it her way she'd have sent me to Mance Rayder and his wildlings beyond the wall and called it a day. So that I'd never be a threat to her precious Gendry or even Barra ever again.

"Benjen had been given my sword." Lord Eddard said softly. "The sword I carry now, I had taken back from him before going to war at your father's side. It's the ancestral sword of House Stark and someday I will pass it down to Robb, and Robb will pass it to your eldest son. So on and so forth. When Benjen had the sword it shattered my heart. My father was alive. Brandon was alive. Why didn't Brandon have it? Because he hated the weight of it. He said the sword spoke to him and told him he was unworthy of it due to his hot temper. Benjen was too timid and I... I was the one who was balanced. The sword requires balance, Alana, as does everything else in life. Your parents may not have balanced their children well, but you, sweetling, you will balance your children and your husband well."