Muted

Chapter Fourteen

Chapter Fourteen

You weren't sure you had ever felt 'sick' before, but you were pretty sure that was the right word for how you were feeling now.

Your chest felt like it was caving in, each breath a struggle as your lungs tightened. Your mind was trapped in a relentless loop of despair, spinning until nausea churned in your stomach, making it impossible to keep food down.

But this wasn't a cold, and you weren't contagious. This was heartbreak, and you weren't sure you would survive it, especially when you had to go about your work day as if it was just any other.

"Miss Tanaka, you must understand that your logic is flawed," Dr. Eteri said, his voice clinical as he sat beside Miss Tanaka's bed.

"It doesn't make sense to you, but that doesn't mean it doesn't make sense," she replied, her tone defiant despite the ever-increasing doses of her Daily Supplements.

"Surely you realize that dulling the senses is necessary." Dr. Eteri continued, his voice steady as if reciting a well-practiced speech, "It's the only way to protect ourselves from the consequences of negative  emotions."

Miss Tanaka turned sharply to glare at him, pulling herself away from where you were gently dressing her wound.

"Why don't you understand? I'd rather live with those negative emotions than forget the ones I cherish," she shot back.

You froze, eyes burning as your hand hovered just behind her, her bandage still in your grasp.

Her words resonated deeply with you.

Over the past few months, Yuzuru Hanyu had opened your eyes—and your heart. But in doing so, he had also left you exposed to a pain you had never known.  Knowing that soon another woman would lie beside him, your heart was in shambles.

Yet, despite the agony, you never once wished to forget him. Not once did you want to erase the memory of how your heart swelled when he smiled, how his lips felt on yours, or how safe you felt in his arms. Those memories, those feelings—they were worth every ounce of heartache.

And, you would never let anyone take those feelings away from you.

"Well, clearly this conversation is going nowhere while you're so controlled by your emotions," Dr. Eteri said, standing up from his chair. Without another word, he turned to leave the room.

When the door closed behind him, you continued your work, gently pressing the adhesive bandage to Miss Tanaka's back, careful not to cause her pain. Her wound, still raw due to infection, was taking much longer to heal than it should. When your touch lingered, and you noticed her breaths coming quicker, more shallow. You wished you could soothe her, just as you wished you could soothe the ache in your own heart.

"I'm sorry," you whispered, so softly you were sure she couldn't hear.

You didn't see the small smile that curved on Miss Tanaka's lips.