You Belong With Me [Completed]

Chapter 12 - I Thought I Am Straight

"I miss you"
Freen said, her voice is shaking.

Becky stopped her feet, she slowly turn around, look at Freen for last time and walk away.

Freen just stand there, at the Armstrong's gate. She want to run after Becky, but the ground hold her in the spot, she can't move.

Days pass by, after that awkward moment, they hardly see eachother. Freen couldn't be happy at all, its like all her happiness suck out of her body.

She is laying on her bed, looking at her family photo, her parents, little self of Sam and herself.

Freen smile a little how happy they were, in that photo, even Sam didn't smile, she know her twin is happy, as she is clinging towards their mother.
That's the way of showing Sam's happiness, always clingy to their mother.

And that's what she is doing with her wife right now. So Freen know her sister is happy, and she is happy for her twin.

Freen missed her Mama. Their Mama is smiling widely, holding them on both arm, and their father standing next to them.

"I miss you, Mama"

She try to closed her eyes, but everytime she try, she saw Becky's face.
She thought why she miss Becky alot.

Everytime she try to forget, Becky's face pop up in her mind. She doesn't know how to deal with this and the distance between them killing her.

When they are next to eachother, she couldn't looked or talk to Becky. But when they are away, she miss Becky.

That day at Armstrong's resident, she couldn't make eyes contact with Becky, everytime she looked at Becky's face, it always land on her plump lips, always remembered Becky's kiss.

She kissed few guys in her life, but Becky's is most interesting one, that affect her the most. When Becky kiss her it was so soft, sweet, unlike those guys, they are rough and hard. And Becky smell good too.

Her head is full of monologue

'Why I miss you, Beck. OK let's say I am wrong about my sexuality, lets say I like you, if we become a couple, what will people say, a pair of twins fall in love with another pair of twins. Thats will be nice topic to talk. And What will be dad reaction? What will be my phi reaction?
Oh my God Sarocha you are so complex.'

She asked lots of questions herself,

'Do I fall for you, Beck or this is just a fling or crush things. But I never felt this way towards anyone. Keep aside Mama, I never missed someone like this, not even my ex. But what I felt now is totally opposite to what I said to you. Is it because I thought of Sam that time, or what was my feeling back then. Ok Sarocha sleep, you are not helping yourself. Your train of thoughts, is sure about to train wreck'

On other hand her ex, Chet is giving her hard time, a big headache. Saying she is his. She never thought the guy is delusional, don't want to accept the reality. Still denying that he cheated on her, always asked her to get back together, following her.

Freen couldn't concentrate on her work like before, she always day dreaming.

"Freen are you not ready to talk yet?"

Freen looked at Nam, she just silently sitting on her chair. She didn't answered.

"Oh my friend, life is so unpredictable, I never imagine you would be like this, all heartbroken."
"What she might think of me?"
"Who? Becky? Oh my stupid friend, what you want to know?"

Freen took a deep breathe, think for few seconds and said

"I really don't know what I want"
"Why are you this much clueless?"
"Then let me understand, enlighten me"
"How could I do that, you are the one that should know, whether you want her or not, how could I know? I am not you"
"Help me"