Second Chances (GEMINIFOURTH)

Chapter 5: Gemini's Doubts

Weeks pass, and the tension between Fourth and Gemini continues to grow, like a storm cloud gathering on the horizon. Fourth remains quiet, distant, and distracted, while Gemini tries to bridge the gap, unaware of the monumental secret Fourth is keeping from him. Their interactions, once filled with warmth and affection, have become strained, marked by awkward silences and forced smiles.

One afternoon, Fourth heads to the university library to work on a project, hoping that burying himself in his studies will keep his mind off the whirlwind of emotions swirling inside him. As he walks through the campus, he spots Gemini sitting with a group of friends at a nearby café, laughing and talking animatedly. For a moment, Fourth considers joining them, but a pang of anxiety stops him in his tracks. He doesn't feel like he belongs there, not with this secret weighing him down.

Instead, he sits at a nearby bench, out of sight but close enough to overhear their conversation. As he listens, his heart sinks. The lightness in Gemini's voice is something he hasn't heard in weeks, and Fourth can't help but feel like he's the reason for its absence when they're together.

The conversation shifts as one of Gemini's friends brings up the topic of relationships and the future. "So, Gem, what's the deal with you and Fourth? You guys have been together for a while now. Do you see yourselves going the distance?"

Fourth holds his breath, his heart pounding in his chest as he waits for Gemini's response. There's a pause, and then Gemini speaks, his tone more serious than before.

"I don't know, man," Gemini says, his voice thoughtful. "I care about Fourth, I really do. But we're still so young, you know? I have so many plans, and I don't know if I'm ready to settle down or commit to anything serious right now. There's just so much ahead of us... so much I want to accomplish before I think about that kind of future."

The words hit Fourth like a punch to the gut. He feels like the ground has been ripped out from under him. He had always feared that Gemini might not be as committed as he was, but hearing it confirmed so casually, so matter-of-factly, feels like a betrayal. The fear that has been gnawing at him all this time—that Gemini might leave him once he finds out the truth—now feels almost inevitable.

Fourth quickly leaves the café area, his hands trembling as he walks across campus. His mind is a whirlwind of emotions—hurt, fear, betrayal. He replays Gemini's words over and over again, each repetition deepening the pain. It's one thing to have doubts, but to hear Gemini express them so openly, without any indication that he's considering their future together, is devastating.

His confidence, already fragile, is shattered. Fourth begins to doubt everything—his relationship with Gemini, the decisions he's made, even his own worth. How can he possibly tell Gemini about the pregnancy now, knowing that Gemini isn't even sure if he wants a future with him? The thought of being rejected, of having to raise this child alone, becomes all the more terrifying.

For the first time, Fourth seriously considers the possibility that he might need to leave Gemini altogether. The idea fills him with dread, but it also seems like the only way to protect himself from the inevitable heartbreak that now feels like it's looming on the horizon.

As the days go by, Fourth becomes more and more consumed by his internal turmoil. He struggles to focus on his studies, his thoughts constantly drifting back to that conversation. His interactions with Gemini become increasingly strained, filled with unspoken words and hidden pain.

Gemini, sensing that something is wrong, tries to reach out, but Fourth pulls away, too hurt and too scared to let him in. The distance between them grows wider, and Fourth feels more isolated than ever, trapped in a prison of his own making.

At night, when he's alone in his room, Fourth lies awake, his mind racing with fears and doubts. He wonders what will happen if he tells Gemini the truth—will Gemini walk away, leaving him to face this on his own? Or will he feel obligated to stay, out of duty rather than love? Neither option feels like a path to happiness, and the uncertainty is slowly driving Fourth to the edge.

One evening, as Fourth lies in bed, staring up at the ceiling, the weight of his situation becomes too much to bear. He feels like he's drowning, suffocated by the fear and the loneliness that have taken hold of his heart. In a moment of desperation, he picks up his phone, his thumb hovering over Gemini's name in his contacts.

But before he can bring himself to call, the doubts creep in again. What if this conversation only confirms his worst fears? What if it drives the final wedge between them? Fourth's hand shakes as he lowers the phone, unable to go through with it.

Instead, he curls up in bed, his thoughts a whirlwind of pain and confusion. He feels trapped—trapped between the life he once knew and the uncertain future that now looms ahead. The secret he's carrying feels heavier than ever, and he doesn't know how much longer he can bear it.

By the time morning comes, Fourth has made a decision, though it's one he doesn't fully acknowledge even to himself. He will continue to keep the pregnancy a secret for as long as he can. He will protect himself from the heartbreak that he's convinced is inevitable. If Gemini is already having doubts about their future, then revealing the truth now will only push him further away.

It's a decision born out of fear, not logic, and deep down, Fourth knows it. But in his fragile state, it feels like the only way to survive. The wall between him and Gemini grows taller, built from layers of insecurity, pain, and secrecy. And with each passing day, the gap between them becomes harder to bridge.

But Fourth knows that this fragile peace can't last forever. Sooner or later, the truth will come out, and when it does, he fears it will shatter everything he holds dear.