My anger flares, but I remain silent, lost in the depths of his mesmerizing eyes. "You have a knack for getting on my nerves," he says, chuckling softly.
"And you have a knack for making everything infinitely more complicated," I retort, though my v...
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Fear. Fear is an emotion I wish I could feel. I am constantly presented with situations in which I should be fearful, scared, terrified. It's a normal human response to run, hide, or protect oneself when experiencing fear.
But as I stand in this cold, empty office, waiting to be punished, I feel no fear, no urge to run away, no need to protect myself.
It's endless, feeling nothing, it feels like a neverending void of darkness that constantly engulfs you, digs its claws into you, feeds on you.
My father's office is large, but the only thing in it is a desk and chair. He was never fond of personalizing a space, he prefers to only have what is needed to get the job done. Though it is empty, it's sleek, there's a wall of windows allowing the early morning sun to shine through behind his glass desk. Other than that, It's a hollow shell.
The heels of his expensive shoes clack against the cold, tiled floor as he slowly makes his way around his desk to me. He looks the same. Salt and pepper hair bordering on gray, his glasses sitting on the tip of his nose, and the classy button up and slacks he wore with his matching belt that tied the look together.
"What did I say about the races, Jisung." His deep voice eco's through the empty space. He wasn't asking, he knew I knew. So I don't say anything, I wanted to get this over with. "Are you so disobedient, you can't follow a simple request?"
I bow my head as he steps closer to me, towering over me with his stern gaze. "No father." I don't know what he expects me to say. It's the same every time, this conversation, on repeat, over and over.
He rubs a hand over his face and sighs "You are just unable to keep yourself away from illegal activities. Your racing career is over, Jisung. I won't hear another word of it."
"I know, father." I didn't care for my racing career. That's not why I was doing this. But if I told him the real reason, I would be ten feet under by now. "I will do better." I won't, nothing was going to stop me from doing this. It's what I live for. Without it, life would be pointless. An endless repeating film of emotionless actions with pointless outcomes.
His hand reaches forward to harshly clasp my jaw between his fingers. "How many times will I hear this lie before you actually obey the rules Jisung. The next time I hear of your little illegal races the punishment will be much worse than this." He sends a quick jab into my ribs. Making me tumble backward slightly. Hwang had already beaten me to a pulp last night, right where my father decided to focus his energy on today. Perfect. More bruises.
As if my ribs hadn't already taken enough of a beating he sends three more strong intense blows right into my torso before releasing his grip on my jaw. "You're expected at dinner tonight. We are going out to meet guests. There will be no discussion on this Jisung." He steps back, running his fingers through his hair to neaten it.
I did want to argue, very badly. But this certainly wasn't the time to. I'd have to sit through another excruciating dinner with my family and other rich business owners. Fuck me. "Yes father."
